I was diagnosed within the last 2 years with GAD, mild depressive episodes, panic disorder, and OCPD tendencies. Though, I've learned through therapy that a lot of the other issues stem from my GAD (and past abusive experiences). Before I really understood what was going on in my head and body, I was very ashamed about how I was because I thought it was my fault. The GAD and panic disorder made me very afraid of new situations and I always thought people were judging me (usually for absolutely no reason). I was also very frustrated with God and why I was feeling the way that I was. And it also made me very irritated when people would tell me to just pray.

Being in therapy really helped me look at not only me, and my thoughts, but helped me understand why I act the way I do. It also helped me be proud of me. I was able to learn how to do with different "bad" aspects and the ways I can use how I am to do something productive. It was in those I realized that while bad things can happen to people, it is how we react and how we use that situation. And that even things that can cause us pain and stress can ultimately be good things that we can use.

I hope this at least gives you some kind of hope you can hold onto. And if you want to talk more about it I'm all for it.

many of the symptoms that u are describing may have to do with a chemical imbalance in your brain, that medication may be able to help. I also suffer from anxiety and OCD- my OCD was insane, to the point I was vacuuming several times a day, I would do the same thing over and over, I put 7 bottles of water in my bag to bring with me to my dr apt- at the apt I realized what I had done and thought I completely lost my mind and would be placed in an asylum, he said no, u have very severe anxiety- and I need medication I will be fine (I truly believed nothing would help, but humored him and began medication) needless to say now I forget to take my water with me, Im not saying I am cured by any means, there are many layers to why we are the way we are, there are many different types of help/coping mechanisms- medication helps take the edge off and perhaps a good therapist or someone to talk to will help get everything bottled up inside u out...personally Ive found this site to be so helpful in the sense that I journal every day, and that is a form of therapy for me, there are many ppl here who have much more experience than I who have walked in my shoes and are so helpful with me on this journey. You are not alone. I wish u the very best, and hope u find a path that is right for u, don't give up if the first few options don't work out, everyone is different, and we all heal and get better at our own rate. Good luck to u.