Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
hubby is in another round of cardiology yaddahs. he has an extended history of high blood pressure and digestive woes. the combo put him in a 3 month near death experience in 2013/14. last week he went to a doctor for foot pain and ended up an overnight hospital stay for his blood pressure and heart arythmia. my psychopatious wife sense is that he is channeling his repressed emotions again into over-working again. please don't make me do another 3 month death watch, beloved.
leaving hubby to sort his own repressed emotions, the meanest source of my own repressed emotions this morning is the urban homestead. the house sits a 3 hour drive from the epicenter of our current challenge of raising three young orphans, ages 4, 7 and 9. just maintaining the property is an unpleasant inconvenience. then we get to the grief of losing two sons in that house, one to death, one to estrangement. i haven't actually lived in that house for many of the years since we bought the place in 2011. between my river research and the loving embrace of toxic mom honors bestowed by two adult sons who lived there with their daddy, the place didn't hold much appeal for me.
the children are on spring break next week. the woman who has been watching over the place during our years of neglect **says** she will have the remainder of her stuff out of the house by then. **says** i'm having extra difficulty believing words this morning. don't tell me. show me. the fact is that i really don't want to spend spring break dealing with adult child drama. what i want is a magic wand to make that entire adult child drama disappear from my senior citizen plate. just wanting. . . there is what i want and there is what i get.
just venting while i pray for closure of that unhappy chapter of my life.
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
Your husband will try to monitor his health and you're probably right, doing work and getting your mind off health problems makes sense. If there are specific things he can do better he should be interested in advice, but simply ventilating problems without solution is typically not a male endeavor.
Here's to the success of managing the business of dealing with that challenge as you keep your feelings in sorted comfort.
Way to go through venting all of the challenges in a safe manner!
Detachment and compartmentalizing helps me feel like I can withstand those times when what is outside of my control is giving what I get and not what I want.
Hoping you get what you want and need.
thank you, mid. the venting does, indeed, help. sometimes it even clears my head far enough that i can actually recognize those unexpected gifts when they land on my shoulder.
thank you, rmb. in the venture of unloading the urban homestead, what i want isn't even on the menu. i'll settle for doing the best i can with what life sends me to work with. the sooner begun, the sooner done.