Hi angelscry,

Well, that last part would really be worrisome if I were in your shoes. Do you find increased negativity and anxiety in your thoughts and actions associated with this anticipated change?

Prior to or in anticipation to some change, my spouse often times picks up on my change in behavior before I notice it myself. I get more irritable, become less available emotionally, am less focused on the present moment, and of course, the anxiety levels are going up up up.

What behaviors constitute negativity. I'm always referring back to CBT, so I'll ask myself if the behavior or thought is benefiting or harming me. Also, am I treating me like I would my best friend?

As for negative thought patterns, where do I begin?

-Am I obsessing over something that in hindsight turns out to be the most trivial thing in my world?

-Am I worrying about how someone perceived what I said even though I objectively know what I said and how I said it was morally and professionally responsible?

-Am I playing the comparison game?

-Am I continuing to beat myself up over something that happened 15 years ago but can't seem to let go?

I could go on and on, but hope that gives you an idea. Keep sharing and stay positive. Hope I was able to help someone today.

Negativity is looking at things with a negative outcome. Sort of self-defining. But if you think of a bad outcome or experience then you are negative. Now some of this may be warranted but if all outcomes look bleak then you are have a negative outlook.

Do you feel you are negative?

I've been thinking on this since this morning and find that even my electrical design understanding of positive and negative is shaky, at best. The figurative definition is even muddier in my head. The best I've come up with is

I am being negative when I feel bad about what is coming out of my mouth and/or spinning in my head. When I have found my positive spin, even making the unpleasant changes and/or drawing the hard boundaries feels healthy and right.

Negative and Positive are both anxiety markers.

In the workplace, what someone else says, does, or how they react is NOT your problem. You are responsible for what you say, do, and how you respond, react, and you choose either negative or positive.

In my healing, I choose positive or neutral for my well-being.

Depends on exactly what you are meaning by "negative".

Thank you for your comments, everyone.

I sometimes feel like I am being negative because I am complaining about how others are treating me. The day that I posted this, I felt like I was being very negative because of a few reasons. One, I don't like listening to the people around me (they sound like two-faced people at all times), but I can't just listen to headphones because I need to be available to answer my work phone. The other part that happened is that I am in my office on the phone with a vendor and my boss for verification purposes. (no one was in the room and no one was scheduled to be in the room), but as soon as people knew that I was on the phone I get three people in here being loud and talking about things that didn't relate to business. (Thank goodness for mute). I also get upset because I am told that I have to consider how what I am doing will affect other people, so I can't print the bills that I pay for the company because I don't always get time in my office where it won't affect other people.

Is it negative to complain about the way other's treat me? Is it negative to feel like you never get considered?

In the workplace, there should be a written standard policy that would provide neutral ways to resolve this situation so that work can be completed in a timely manner.

In the workplace, rather than people, focus on action, and what the end result is of completed tasks in a timely manner.

Complaining about the way we are treated does NOT change the outcome. Changing the way we respond to the way we are treated does change the outcome.

Best wishes in finding your way through this situation.