Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
I have a 60 year old boyfriend I been dating for 1 year. I recently found out he has anxiety being around people he doesn't really know. At Thanksgiving he sat in the living room by himself at my sister's house. I was embarrassed as the guys were watching football in another room and alot of people mingling in the kitchen. I know he didn't know anyone except my sister's family but it was weird. On the way home is when he told me about his anxiety around others. I do feel bad but I don't get it. He was married for 15 years has 2 adult children and works with others. He didn't divorce for this reason. I suggested he see a family doctor who could maybe give him something for the anxiety. He's totally against it. I am totally the opposite. I'm outgoing and enjoy meeting new friends. I'm torn as to what to do. I want to go out with him with others to dinner or whatever but I don't see it happening. Any advice??? Please help.
-
Hiya,It's cloudy with the occasional show of sunshine. It was sooo hot last night, felt like the worst night this year, which is odd because it's been incredibly hot this summer for us. Maybe I just felt it last night.Still, it's all going to change now and the weather will shift. Of course there's going to be a few more nice days left this month and next, but essentially I guess the "hot...
-
Maybe introduce him to small groups of people, or have outings with 2 or 3 other people. Dunno.
Personally, I only associate with family. I don't have any face to face friends in my area. I get buy with email, chat, and phone friends.
To make it even funner, every case of social anxiety is unique. Nothing I tell you about *my* social anxiety is guaranteed to apply to your BF's case. It is not wise to rely on second-hand information while attempting to understand *his* social anxiety.
I guess my suggestion is *simple* acceptance and tolerance. *Simply* listen with an open and trusting heart.
I must say that I do really feel so sorry for him. Anxiety is the worst. And if he doesn't want to get help...there is nothing you can do....other than put up with it or move on.
Anxiety has pretty much shut down my life and I have done soooo much to try and make things better.
And I will say that NO one could ever understand it unless they are going through it.
Wishing you both the very best.
I really empathize with your BF. When I'm around my wife's friends I have a terrible time mixing with them. I'm an introvert you see. Maybe due to social anxiety, but it doesn't really matter why. I can set completely alone in that crowded room and 100% fine with it. The only guilt or negative feeling I have at all is for my wife, who wishes I could make a connection with someone. Thankfully, she forgives first and asks questions later so we're cool. Overtime, I've connected with most of her people but she, my wife, doesn't try and change me anymore. I chose really well.
Now for your situation, like I said at the front. You need to determine if this is a deal breaker or not for you. Ya'll aren't married, so there's minimal downside to moving on. But if you stay, if you love him. Forgive him and only try and help him in this area if he wants to--if he really wants to, not if you want him to want to. At 60 my guess is that he's doing just fine this way. God speed.