Anxiety Support Group
Anxiety is a physical condition marked by intense and persistent feelings of distress, fear, angst or dread. General anxiety caused by routine day-to-day stresses usually passes quickly and is experienced by almost everyone at one time or another. However, such feelings that linger over time and are very difficult to cope with, and which lack a clear cause, may indicate...
Hi everyone. I am new to this site and to this particular group as well. I have been dealing with anxiety since I lost my dad when I was 13 years old. It started off not as bad but I've noticed that as I got older and got into more tramua-induced situations in life, it got worse and worse. It is now to the point where I can barely leave my home. I don't go anywhere alone, I don't drive, I don't have a job, and I live with my parents (yes, at age 30). It feels like anxiety has literally stolen my life from me. I am constantly in fear of getting killed or hurt, of something bad happening, of making a fool of myself. Every little thing causes me anxiety. It's even hard for me to be around my own family now and just socialize.
I am currently in therapy and on medication, and yes it's gotten a bit better. But I still struggle to even just talk a walk by myself around the block (a reoccuring weekly goal that my therapist and I have. I still haven't been able to do it, even with the dog or taking my boyfriend)
I am the kind of person who compares myself to others, and I see all these people my age and younger that have careers and families and their own place. I just feel like I'm going so slow in life and that I don't have much time left.
Anyways, yeah kinda some stuff about me. Sorry if it's a little scattered. Racing thoughts are no fun lol
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I haven't written in my diary on my computer since May because I thought that my computer was dying. I got away from writing but my computer is hanging in there. I think that I will start writing in it again. It's so therapeutic.
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Years ago, I won a mirrored armoire from my job. It's in my bedroom but I rarely stand in front of it. Yesterday, I had to have a dexascan done so I had to change into a gown. There was a full length mirror in the changing room. I'm aware that I gained 5 to 7 pounds over the last year from cheating on Keto but I didn't know what it looked like. It was a reality check.
If you can just take a step back and realize this is your own journey. Everyone else doesn't have the same childhood wounds as you, others may not be suffering from trauma or mental illness, as you.
So we leave alot out of the comparison game don't we? You are living life with a few emotional boulders strapped to your legs and asked to just keep going.
Well, fortunately you are in a place where you are beginning to heal. Understanding your issues is just as important as healing from them, or at least learning tools to use when they manifest again.
There is absolutely no shame in that. When my anxiety was at my highest, I was having panic attacks going 2 miles down the street to eat at a restaurant with my mom. I had to turn around and drive home, b/c the anxiety was building up so badly.
You will have low points with anxiety. Where you seems so crippled. But give it some time. Just accept that right now you are feeling this way. But don't forget the tools you are learning in order to challenge your anxiety and power thru when needed.
You will have to get to a point where you have to challenge it. This week you take the walk around the block. Feel the emotions, the panic, and have some handy mantras. "I am walking around this block, and I will feel uncomfortable and if I faint or fall over, I will just accept it," The next week go a block and a half.
Baby steps, small goals, and then enjoy the confidence you get from each win.
But the worst thing to do, is stay in the comfort zone of discomfort. You will become agoraphobic and have to dig yourself out.
Instead of comparison yourself to others. I did this. I would see someone, and think of something I like about them. Nice hair. He has nice shoes on. I like their smile. Anything. It will take the focus off the perpetual comparison game. Then maybe give yourself a compliment too.
It'll help you break that cycle.
Sending you light and love!
I'm a compulsive comparer and have even been paid for that compulsion to help with design analysis projects. I can't afford to kick the comparing habits, so I shifted the focus to doing it well. The fatal flaw I found in the compulsive comparing that comes out of my social anxiety is that I'm typically comparing my insides to other people's outsides. When I scrape the surface of other people's outsides, I all to often find that they are as good at metaphorical masking as I am. A smile and friendly manner can hide an awful lot of internal turmoil. Even when I have access to other people's insides, it still isn't a fair comparison because I don't have to live with them 24/7 like I have to live with myself.
Keep sorting and venting, Bumble. Discombobulated posts allowed. They help with the sorting. Listening. . .
You are not alone. Welcome aboard.
You've taken the important first step in writing it out.
Here's the thing about taking those first steps. One step and breathe, one step and breathe. Put one foot in front of the other. You can do this.
Best wishes as you find your better balance.
Hon don’t compare yourself to others, you’re beautiful as you are. Sometimes we feel the pressure to be like others but try to just accept that you’re different and that’s ok. Maybe aim for self acceptance and then take a deep breath and work out what makes you happy. You’re getting help with the anxiety which is your biggest challenge so that’s great.