What has helped me, in the past, has been to think about all the things that cause me to feel trapped.

I've had a fear of elevators. It's an occupational hazard because I work in a high rise hospital. I am not the only person, out of 1800 employees, that has this problem. I've had to talk down a couple of coworkers, who've been stuck for a period of time on an elevator, and on one occasion...the person passed out and was lying on the floor when they got her off the elevator.

I realized that a big part of my anxiety and undefined fear came from internalized shame.

Because of trauma (and you don't realize what's emotionally traumatizing - but I had physical and sexual trauma growing up, also) that we wear the shame because we were made to feel shameful...yet...we normalized it.

A child defines his or her reality based upon the way they are treated. But, while the child yet normalizes to denigration and shame, the child...nevertheless...is denigrated, conquered, brought down and this is counter to a person's self respect (dignity) and this defines shame in the heart of the child.

From some point, the child learns the concept...the concept...of shame...and from that point on, it would not be necessary for anyone to say or do anything to that child for them to feel...shameful.

How does this apply to being stuck on an elevator?

Simple.

Because I am so ashamed of myself and who I am...I feel trapped in my thinking that nobody would care enough about me to come get me off that elevator.

When I came to the reality that, at my hospital (where I've worked for 15 years now), I am very loved and very cared about.

My shame pushed away that love, but I've learned to let others love me...like I've wanted to love them all along. There's freedom in that....and what's better...there's a lot of love in that.

This makes me enjoy my life and I'm not nearly as afraid of things in general, anymore.

So, think about what you think about. I was going to tell you this the other day. I apologize, again, for the cross-up.

It's not what you think; it's the way you think...think about that.

Tigarpaws,
Thanks for sharing the elevator scenerio with me.
I will remember what you said, Its not what you think, its the way you think.. I would write more but I have to get ready for work. Thanks for your advice!

stacey---I am an old man but have dealt with anxiety, panic, and depression for years. The benzos are good. Would it help you to talk with a therapist. I don't know what is going on in your life.

How are your stress levels? Stress is the main cause of Anxiety. Have you tried any meditation in your off time? It brings the brains stress hormone levels back down to a normal level over time. There is a website that helped me more than o can even say. It is called "anxietycentre.com". Through this website, therapy, and self research I was able to rid myself of almost all anxiety symptoms and panic disorder without the use of any medicine! Knowledge is power! When your symptoms are at their worst you must remember they are only symptoms of an over stressed mind and nervous system. It can be very challenging to calm yourself when you are experiencing symptoms. I once told my husband that trying to calm yourself through a panic attack is like sitting in a burning building and trying to just sit through it and stay calm. I was not able take any medicine, they just made my symptoms worse. At the time it was a very crushing blow, I just wanted something to make me feel better. Today I understand this was truly a blessing in disguise. It forced me to deal with why I was so anxious and how to calm my mind in which rid me of the horrible symptoms.
I wish you all of the best! Please let me know if I can help in any way.
Nicole