I am new here but really need to talk to people who understand.
My doctor gave me meds for anxiety a year ago and yesterday I saw a psychiatrist because I wanted a proper diagnosis
He said I had agoraphobia which I have read up on a realize its not just never wanting to leave the house.
I have no issue being in public but I do avoid certain situations to an extreme degree. I dont want to freak out in public.
Then today I found myself crashing into that situation. My personal kryptonite
My car broke down!! I know why. I havent taken it for an oil change because I missed the month I was meant to do it and then it snowballed because I didnt want to be told Id ruined the car or scolded for not taking care of the car. I just havent taken it in for months and months.
I asked my boyfriend to take the car in a while ago but he just explained how easy it would be and I dropped it because I was to embarrassed to explain the idea of taking my car for an oil change made me have a panic attack. I didnt want to have a panic attack explaining it!! It was hard enough to ask.
Now Im at home waiting to hear how bad the car is and I actually feel like I would rather die than deal with this.
Its so embarrassing to be a functional adult who cries and vomits over the idea of an oil change.
I cant stop crying and I cant take a full breath.
My anxiety has gotten really bad. Ive had 3 flat tires with one blow out on highway then spin out on ramp which left me in a ditch. I wasnt hurt but now im terrified of driving. Especially when it rains and we've been getting rain everyday so i havent gone far. Just to grocery store. Ive had to cancel appts for fear of driving. I just dont lnow how to overcome it. I feel trapped.
Again I find myself wanting to say talk about what I’m feeling right now, but I can’t find the words. its frustrating. For days I’ve been feeling lost and in a panic all at the same time. I want to express myself, but I can’t get the words out. Maybe I just don’t know myself the way I should. About 2 years ago I basically had a mental break down of sorts. I feel like ever since then...