i think i nearly had a panic attack just a few minutes ago. i woke up and said 10 days left until my boyfriend comes home from basic training. and thats when i thought i was going to have to turn over and throw up. i was the most nervous i have been since he left. i wanted to cry but i knew if i did then i would get to breathing to fast and hyperventelate so i did keep calm in that aspect. i thought i was going to have to yell for my mom to come in my room and calm me down. right now i am shaking a little bit. i feel like im getting back to the way i was b4 matt left (sick and nervous and throwing up every day) and i DONT like it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i feel like i cant do this. i mean i know i can but i know it wont be good. this is awful idk what to do. my stomach has been bothering me for a few days now. i dont want to loose weight like i did over the summer. but when i get like this my stomach shuts off and i cant eat. idk what to do here. i need help. but theres not much time for it. b/c i got 10 days and they r going fast.
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