Anger Management Support Group
Anger management commonly refers to therapeutic techniques by which someone with excessive or uncontrollable anger can control or reduce their emotions. Typical examples include the use of deep breathing and meditation as a means to relaxation. Psychologists recommend a balanced approach, which both controls the emotion and allows it to express itself in a healthy way.
I happen to use my anger to cover up alot of what I couldnt express. Or didnt know how to. I used to be under control when I was younger because my mom and sister always fought. I was the referee and just tried to hear and keep both sides calm. They both were right about each others problem but they are such HBIC's (Head Bitches In Charge) that they were blind to their own conclusion.
I practiced with my mom and sister control at a young age and they didnt know it. I would try to give advice but the arguments were so heated I (many times) had to shut up and listen to one or the other. I had the urge to talk and I just held that urge in and tried to remember everything everyone said and my answer on top of that just so I can give them my full and undivided attention. Finally, when I couldnt even say what I needed to say to stop the argument because they kept blaming each other, I just hollered at the top of my lungs and said TIME THE FUCK OUT!!! LOL!! Then that precious moment of silence that followed was my only opportunity to say something, and I just raised my voice and said it. I should have used my inside voice so I wouldnt have made the situation too hyped up.
Now I just have a problem of raising my voice alot (one or two octaves above the other person) just to get my point across as if raising my voice would make them give me what I want. It got so bad I yelled at a deaf co worker because he was so OCD about someone doing his work and he was just out to get me. I knew he was because he would do things, and I caught him once, that would make it seem to my Supervisors that I wasnt doing my job!! He didnt listen to any Executives and there was a big folder on the guy and all the stuff he got into with other co worker. I just blew up at him in front of a client and I couldnt control myself it felt sooooo good....
I want to be able to control this urge this anger that builds up. What kind of exercises (Im pretty sure you heard this one before) can I practice that can calm me down in the moment?? What should I be thinking about when its my time to say something and the lava of anger is about to spill out???
I practiced with my mom and sister control at a young age and they didnt know it. I would try to give advice but the arguments were so heated I (many times) had to shut up and listen to one or the other. I had the urge to talk and I just held that urge in and tried to remember everything everyone said and my answer on top of that just so I can give them my full and undivided attention. Finally, when I couldnt even say what I needed to say to stop the argument because they kept blaming each other, I just hollered at the top of my lungs and said TIME THE FUCK OUT!!! LOL!! Then that precious moment of silence that followed was my only opportunity to say something, and I just raised my voice and said it. I should have used my inside voice so I wouldnt have made the situation too hyped up.
Now I just have a problem of raising my voice alot (one or two octaves above the other person) just to get my point across as if raising my voice would make them give me what I want. It got so bad I yelled at a deaf co worker because he was so OCD about someone doing his work and he was just out to get me. I knew he was because he would do things, and I caught him once, that would make it seem to my Supervisors that I wasnt doing my job!! He didnt listen to any Executives and there was a big folder on the guy and all the stuff he got into with other co worker. I just blew up at him in front of a client and I couldnt control myself it felt sooooo good....
I want to be able to control this urge this anger that builds up. What kind of exercises (Im pretty sure you heard this one before) can I practice that can calm me down in the moment?? What should I be thinking about when its my time to say something and the lava of anger is about to spill out???
2..Remember you do not have to put your two cents in
3. Most people do not want or ask for our advice so don't give any
4. Try writing what you want to say in a letter
. In a letter you can express yourself in a very calm way .with out yelling
6. Let it go for a while, bring it up later when everyone has calmed down.
7. Remember you do not have to be right and you do not have to prove it.
8. Remember it is just your opinion and everyone has one and has a right to it.
9. Do not interrupt or butt in to someones business.
10. If it is none of your business, stay out of it unless someon is puttng some one in danger
11. Remember you cant always correct a relationship between other people.
12 . We all have a right to express anger and most of the time it is ok to do so as long as we don't build too big of a fire or hurt some in the process. Venting our anger is one way to keep the fire small.