I definitely would have if it weren't for Carl being a disabled vet. He got all his meds through the VA at no charge and most of the equipment that he needed like a walker and scooter and ramp on the house. He only got this because he was 100 % service connected, meaning that his disability was from time served in the military.
I know you mentioned that Rollie went to a VA respite facility. Does he see VA drs? Mine has been seeing only VA drs. since his retirement in 1985. If we would have had to pay for all his meds, I would be standing in the soup line.
Have you heard of Angel Food Ministries? Google it for your area. It is a good deal and VERY reasonable.

Yes, he gets 100% VA benefits and a pension from them but we have 3 kids trying to get through college. They also get VA help, thank God! It is just such a struggle because we used to be able to do what we wanted and now I have to watch every penny.

We are ok now but depending upon how long this process takes and whether or not I am physically able to care for him in late stages that scenario that will change. Without his SS and only a very small part of his pension, if my IRA is eaten up with NH costs, I will most likely not be able to maintain my home. We really got hit hard when his prescription, eye glass and dental coverage that were supposed to be "lifetime benefits" were taken away two years ago. His medications (Aricept and Seroquel) were very costly.......better now that I get them overseas; however, I understand Obama is going to start taxing those of us who order drugs from out of the country. Difficult to catch a break isn't it?

Really, really tough for us. Mother is supporting both of us and I also take a salary. Not much left over at all. We're much more fortunate than some and not as much as others. I think we're kind of in the middle. Personally, on my own, with no job, I'd qualify for anything and everything which, actually, might not be so bad.

I was worried sick Ron would end up in a NH for years. I could have been left a very poor old lady. As it is... I lost over half our income when he died. So I am still adjusting to the lower income.. trying
to figure out a workable budget.

It wasn't supposed to be like this.

Wow Deborah, didn't know you were trying to put three kids through college on top of everything else.
As for the VA Insurance, I called them during the week after the funeral and they said they were sending me a very short form to fill out and send back. I haven't received it yet. So I'm guessing it won't be a quick return with the money either.

I know you are not old enough to get SS when Rollie is gone, but I would think the kids should get something because they are still in school.
The $2,000. 00 benefit is one...there are 2 others at $300.00 each. Depending on what you qualify for...the maximum you can get is the $2,000.00. do you have a benefits booklet? You can go online and read it. Go to www.va.gov for the home page...not sure but think you can go to other sites from there.
The burial and memorial benefits are www.cem.va.gov
I'm so sorry you are having to deal with financial problems in addition to Rollies declining condition. I wish you peace.

My parents are very comfortable right now. They are lucky that my mom taught HS so she has medical benefits for life but it is not the most comprehensive. It is an old BC/BS type where you pay and they reimburse partial. Same with medications. And they have no dental or optical. So they can easily pay $5K a year in out of pocket medical.

They have no nursing home or skilled care insurance so that will be the big issue. Since dad really wants to stay at home they plan to bring help in but it will all be private pay.

My brother and I are OK with them spending their money to live the way they want. My sister on the other hand thinks they need to "hide" money or just give it to her...lmao I'm not kidding. It's funny how some kids think the inheritance is theirs before the person is gone.

All of you are wonderful people. Trying to survive with little.
Lets hope the Repub. do not take away Med and Soc Sec.. That would be terrible for all the retiree!
There are other ways to save money.

check this out:
http://www.rebuildthedream.com/launch-highlights.php

Hi Deb, we are fine financially now as both were professionals and saved as we went. However G is not a vet and when the time comes for him to be hospitalized in a residential care for Alz. we are going to run out of money. I will be able to keep the house but not afford the taxes.G also is on aricept, seroquel and namenda. Because of serious multichemical sensitivities I could not llve in a residence or apt. We had high expenses last year with his hospitalization and all the specialists and tests. Now this year it is dental care for him. I can't complain. But I can see that people like you are not getting nearly the help you need. May the new budget remember the old and sick.

Deb i worry about this all the time, Our IRA is going fast and his SSD isn't enough to live on. I go to the local food pantry once or twice a month. We don't qualify for medical assistance until all savings are gone, I've sold the extra cars, but the economy is so bad that no one is buying. I have conjestive heart failure and back problems and i really want to be able to take care of him, but i live in a rural area and will probably end up losing all my assets b 4 this is over, may have to get a low income appt. in town b 4 the end . even though my home is paid for and we have some other land, you hate to work all your life just to lose it all to the state for care. But i guess it's only stuff and we can't take it with us..i was hoping to leave our son something but that may not be possible at all. i worked at a shoe factory for 13 years till my heart got bad and drs. have given me up 3 times but i guess i had another purpose in life. taking care of everyone.
hugs to you Deb and i wish you the best .....

Juanita, I am so sorry to hear your hardship!

We need to tell our representatives that, they can not fix the budget by lowering Soc Sec. medicare and medicaid. They have other ways of solving the problem.
If my mom did not have Medicare, Soc sec and medicaid she would be in the street right now!

We must let them know how we feel, so they will not take away what is in place now and that is not enough for people that are struggling!

check this out and fight back for Seniors rights:

http://www.rebuildthedream.com/laun...

I worry about all of this as well. The longer it goes on the worse it seems to get. Ken has life insurance, but it disappears when he turns 70. He is now 67. 3 years, I wonder if he will make another 3 years.

Sorry to hear that Dibbie, Carl had some that went to 1/2 when he turned 70, but didn't disappear. Its hard to say if he will make it or not. he sounds like i'm betting not, but who knows especially when he is so young. Carl had lots of medical issues and was 79 with a hip fracture and high risk surgery. I think he would still be alive if he hadn't broken his hip. it was a long six weeks, but a blessing in so many other ways.
Encourage your children to buy good insurance while they are young so it is more affordable. Don't buy term life...get something that collects interest and dividends. Carl had an $8000.00 policy from state farm that he bought in 1965. It is worth $41,800.00 today. He said a long time ago if he knew it was that good he would have bought more. One never knows!
Hugs.......Carolyn

I think one of the best things to do if you think money will be an issue is to prepay or pay off as much as possible. Especially if a nursing home and medicaid will be involved. Buy the cemetary plot and pay for your funeral. Also gift some money to family who you trust so that they can "hold" it for you. If you do this slowly and in small amounts it won't be found.

Another thing to consider if you have time is to move to a smaller, lower maintenance home. My parents did this when they hit 65 because they didn't want to have to maintain an older home. And for the past year or so they have been replacing things that might go soon like the heat/ac unit which is 15 years old.

I know this isn't always possible, but anything you can do will help. Another idea if you have an extra room and need some help around the house is to take in a boarder in return for chores. There are lots of college and post-college kids who want to get out of their homes but can't afford rent.

It is one of the two things that makes me feels almost suicidal...the other is seeing my husband suffer....

The thought that we could end up impoverished is making me crazy.

I have struggled SO hard to keep this leaking ship afloat.....I don't mind being frugal it is a lifetime habit except for an occasional 'splurge' but this financial stuff is way way too much.