Telling someone you are an alcoholic can be tricky, for me I don't trust anyone so I would not tell to many people. But when the moment comes in the conversation I'm straight up and honest with them "I'm a alcoholic" as honest is the best policy living sober and free

Hi Ashley, my feelings are still that it's a private matter and the only people who I tell are those that need to know and those who confide they are having problems with alcohol, so my code is similar to Brandon's.

The tricky one is who really needs to know. Why not have a confidential chat with a tutor if you are not sure. Some circumstances are special.

For me, the people I work with have never questioned why I don't drink - no-one really cares whether you are drinking alcohol or not unless they too have a problem with it, it seems.

Alcoholics tend to feel uncomfortable around teetotallers - at least I did when I was drinking!

As far as being asked why I don't drink at work, I often just said I was allergic, and left it at that.
Asking someone if they are a member of Alcoholics ANONYMOUS is incredibly inappropriate. I would make a joke at their expense about not knowing what the 2nd 'A' stands for, without revealing my own membership.
You do not owe casual acquaintances full disclosure. Especially when to do so, would put your future career in jeopardy.

I don't see the need to tell anyone i am an alcoholic unless they have a drinking problem and are looking for help. I see no reason why I would ever tell my boss or my coworkers.

If people ask, I just tell them i do not drink. Only ONCE has anyone I work with asked me why.I don't drink. (He knew me when I did drink.) I said it was because I get migraines (I do) and drinking can trigger them. (they can.)

Do you put it in your paper about yourself for school? I think I would not use the word alcoholic. Being labeled alcoholic can have a real stigma attached -- it can make it difficult to get life insurance or raise insurance rates or effect your chances of getting a job or promotion. I know that sounds a bit paranoid on my part but I tend to err on the side of caution.

I don't think I would tell a coworker that the reason I don't drink because it makes me act crazy. A better explanation is that it doesn't agree with me or makes me feel sick or it wasn't good for me so I decided to quit. Very few people care at all, they are just mildly curious or making conversation. So don't make a big deal of it unless there is a reason you want them to know or you feel like talking about it.

I had a whole long reply written and then DS decided to have a spazz attack...system went wonky and I lost my reply.

Anyway, it's your call. I don't feel the need to tell anyone unless I feel it's necessary in some way, that I want to share with them. Nothing to do with trust, it's just that it doesn't need to be everyone's business. Same as if someone has an extra toe, sings the Mikado in the shower or eats a tub of ice cream in bed every night. I've heard people discuss it outside meetings, with one man asking another "what's the downside of people knowing?" food for thought...

A few friends and family know, my boss knows...that's about it. If there is a compelling reason to share more, so be it. Same with what you said about having your reasons not to share. If that is your gut instinct, go with it. Gossip and misunderstanding of alcoholism and alcoholics may cause more damage. On the other hand, someone who knows someone with an alcohol problem may seek your opinion (which has happened to me).

Pray for guidance, listen to your inner voice. Don't feel pressured to disclose.

Wow, some good replies here all around. For the people who ask me why I don't drink I give the same answer I do as to why I quit smoking 7 years ago. "It wasn"t doing me any good."
I've found that the people who care and may need to know about my past drinking could really care less about it. It's in the past. All that matters is what I do know with this person I am know. Sober, serene and willing to give back to life.

I totally agree with Reply #3 & 4.

My answers are as follows...

I will get one later
I am driving
I have had enough

and my favorite

I dont drink normally

Early in sobriety I was eager to tell everybody... but later I sort of keep it to myself. My family knows and some close friends but my sobriety is something I sort of covet.

So good luck and I will go so far to say that 90 percent of the times that I was worried who would ask what I want or offer me this or that was a total waste of my time.

1is2

This is one I grappled and still grapple with. I tell people I think need to know. My husband, my immediate family, and my very best friends. I tell an entire room of people every morning so that helps me stay grounded in the truth and reality of alcoholism. Important for me as denial was and is a huge part of my disease.
I havent told any doctors and don't include it on my medical questionaires.
I work in a high profile field, and I havent and won't share it with anyone in the professional world. On the other hand I'm not ashamed and I would say my truth if asked directly.

Generally I don't disclose in much the same manner as the others, there are exceptions though, like in jobs working with children or vulnerable adults. Then the employee has a duty of care to disclose these things so the authorities have a full knowledge of the facts.

I'll share a story here...about 9 months sober, I was holding on to a job still by my fingernails but having some problems still. My brain and body were still recuperating and I think I still had some growing up to do. I'd told my boss about drink, and that I was attending meetings but no-one else at work knew.

So my boss calls me up out of the blue at home one day and tells me there are "rumours" flying all around my office that I have a drink problem. Someone said they smelt booze on my breath at 9 in the morning.

Have to say I didn't deal with this very well!! I flipped and got quite paranoid. Anytime anyone disagreed with me at work, it wasn't because I was wrong, it was because they thought I was an Alkie...it seemed so unfair (and later quite ironic) that I'd spent so many years ducking and diving, but never been confronted until I actually was sober!

Long story short I made an idiot of myself several times, crashed into a sober depression and later got let go for 'health reasons' and poor attendance. Whole experience, along with a few other things NEARLY took me back to a drink.

You know what the whole thing taught me? I didn't get sober to skulk around, hide my light under a bushel or live in fear of people finding things out about me. The 'fear' element is the bit that'll do for me, can't afford it. So I'm pretty open these days, though I try not to shove it down peoples throats or make them uncomfortable. I don't drink and I don't see the need to pretend otherwise. Sometimes I make a joke, tell people I'm a Mormon ;o)

I think it's a personal thing though, if we ask ourselves these questions and listen carefully, we get the answers!

Hope you make the right decisions for you

P

After almost 13 years of sobriety, I have found that it depends on where I am, and who I am talking to. Professionally, I have been very open about my recovery. Anonymity is not much of a concern and share my story where appropriate. I would be more careful in my earlier sobriety. Today I am more prepared to discuss my alcoholism. Be careful, others may see this as an opportunity to take advantage of your being in recovery.

Thank you all for the responses and I think I agree with most of you that I should just keep it to myself :) My family does know and close friends...I am not assamed but as you all had said it's my buisness. I loved what Paul said, lol, people don't go around talkinmg about eating a gallon of ice cream a night... and TKV, that was a good joke to make! And great idea to say that it makes me sick, and leave it at that.

Thanks again :)

I rarely have a drink, and I am around friends who drink at restaurants, home, etc. Over the years, no one ever asked me why I drank a coke in a bar or iced tea. And, I never said anything to friends who like to drink and act out!

You don't have to tell anyone that you are an alcoholic. Unless you are drinking on the job and someone confronts you, the question should never arise. You are right, telling the wrong person could be a problem in the future.

My family and freinds know and the people I did amends too (which included my boss as I had lied to her on the 2nd day of starting my job when she challenged me about smelling of alcohol on my 1st day!).

For me, I want to be known as 'm8bear' and not m8bear the alcoholic'. There is still alot of prejudice in the outside world (in my opinion) and I was one of them before AA.

I never forget where I came from yet do not feel others need to know.