Personally, I would speak to a member of AA. Either through an open meeting, or perhaps the spouse of another Al Anon member.

I was fortunate enough to attend a round up where there was a couple speaking. He was in AA and she was in Al Anon. Honestly, sitting down with people from both sides was one of the best conversations I have been in.

Stay strong!

Like you said, you are not the alcohol police. And really, if you dumped every drop down the toilet, he would go right out and replace it, right?

PS. I'm a recovered alcoholic, sober since 07/04/04.

The only way I quit was because the pain was just too great. My wife never told me to quit, because she knew it would just piss me off. I would suggest letting him start doing all the small things , laundry, dishes. Stop padding life and make things hard.
It was the only way I finally decided to seek help.
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“Isn't part of his admission that he is an alcoholic and to make a decision to seek help?”

Yes.

100 times, yes.

Whether or not there is booze in the house is immaterial.

If he wishes to seek help and go down a path towards a different way of living that is 100% on him. The only way you can help is to lead by example and hope he figures out that changing his ways is the right thing to do.

I am a recovering alcoholic with 21 years of clean time.

May the force be with you

He could work at the jack daniels plant and still get sober. He has only one choice to make. And then make it again every day. My wife keeps a beer or two cold and a bottle of wine for the occasional glass. Doesn’t phase me in the slightest. I understand that I just can’t. It’s really very simple. No means no

Removing the alcohol won’t do anything to stop someone who doesn’t want to stop. However, if he does get to that point, get the booze out. No, it’s not the solution but why not make it easier? It’s like leaving crack on the kitchen table when a crack addict is trying to quit.

Thanks everyone... I thought I was right. As a former smoker.. I know that one day I made the decision to quit. no one asked, pleaded, ect. It was all in me to break the habit. And as far as alcohol i can take it or leave it. So, even though we have so much liquor in the house I rarely drink. both of my parents were alcoholics along with my first husband. Ya see, I've traveled this road before and reality has slapped me in the face and it SUCKS. I learned the first time around, just because someone loves you is not a reason for them to quit drinking. the hardest part, I've allowed AH behavior for too long...now I have to change my codependent behavior.

One problem....one solution!

Keep on keeping on!

God Bless

"... just because someone loves you is not a reason for them to quit drinking...."

No. It never is. They have to quit drinking for themselves...at least if they're authentic about it and practice sobriety as a way of living.

Taking a drink is every bit as personal and selfish a decision AS NOT taking a drink.

Like you - lots of experience with my wife and I. My dad was an unhappy alcoholic and my mom a codependent who practiced denial at an Olympic level. Her father was an abusive alcoholic and her codependent mother put up with it. Both moms are still alive - both dads long deceased. It is a herd that is exceedingly hard to fully escape.

My last drink was in 1997 when my wife of 2 years put her foot down and expressed her exasperation with my behavior. I didn't quit drinking for her - I quit drinking because I was ready to surrender and I was exhausted from being out of control and living a double life. She just nudged me over the finish line of my drinking career - a shove I had been needing for a while at that point.

may the force be with you