36 years of growth....

Being of clear mind and a more loving, understanding mom during my kids teen-age years. I hid in a bottle most of the time. I regret losing that time with all my heart. They came out okay but I worry so much about that time we didn't get along together. I know they were damaged in that way.

too much to list.

My integrity and self esteem. I beat myself up all the time and push people away.

I try not to dwell on it.....my years of drinking made me what I am today (for better or worse). It's a part of our growth........it's what you do with the experience that counts.

Dignity , respect, integrity and Me!!!!
Billy

Lost, I guess to much to mention, but if you ask me what I GAINED! from dealing with the loss, well thats a different Story. I am Happy Joyous and Free Today, Life is wonderful

Oh my. I lost friends, jobs, loved ones, memories, chances to have good memories (no matter how great of a time I was having, I'd always have to screw it up by drinking), integrity, self-respect, entire nights and days to black outs, 15 years of emotional and spiritual growth... the list goes on and on.

I was also pretty great at losing my purse when drunk. You don't want to know how many cell phones, IDs, debit cards, wallets, digital cameras, housekeys, etc. I lost.

My dignity as a woman, my responsibility in my working environment, the love of family and friends, many hours/days in blackout that I will never recall (maybe that's a good thing), oodles of money (probably drank a house), physical integrity, as in broken bones, ankle reconstruction, cracked head (always seemed to land on my head) and so it goes on, the years of matruring when I was blackout drinking from 14 to 32. I'm trying to catch up on the maturing now.

It's always so bizzare recounting all that type of stuff as, at 11 years sober it seems like a universe away, like it was done by some other child/woman, but at the same time I remember (the bits I CAN remember) the final lead-up to walking through the doors of AA - and walking through those doors - in stark reality.

I lost my love. But happy I did now lol. Lost my frickin mind at times.

"I once was lost, but now I'm found".....