He has been violent at me... Punched me in the face while wasted... He can also get verbally abusive.

I get paranoid when I drink. After 2 nights of drinking I start to lose my mind. Lack of sleep and alcohol, I will start to believe he's texting other women, going to the bar without me and lying about it, having the bartender cover for him. The thing is at the time I actually believe these things... Even soberly sometimes.

I Know our relationship is messed up. We live together and id like to fix it but I don't know if that's possible.

He has a week vacation in September and I'm scared he's going to be drunk the entire week. He always drinks for the whole week when on vacation.... And I barely get any sleep.

Do YOU want to stop drinking or just want things to get better?

I want to cut back on drinking. Like enjoy a few beer without it getting out of hand..... An alcoholics dream.

thanks for sharing and welcome to our group. question: are you ready to make two of the most difficult choices in your life: to stop drinking and leave an abusive relationship? if not, I'll pray that your suffering will not include anymore physical abuse. if you are, welcome to the beginning of a new life. i can assure you it won't be easy, but it will be the best decision you ever made. take a breath, you can do this!

wishing you the best. (for additional support, i highly recommend you contact your local Alanon chapter)

I don't know how to do that, but hats off to you if you figure out how.

You and I are in the same boat.

We both quit completely for awhile. He longer than I. Recently back at it.

Two nights ago we fought over the last beer. He pushed me.

Over a stupid beer.

Glad to know I am not alone... I recently started photography and when he was drunk he said I'm only posting the photography photos online for attention...

But then today he says shit like, oh I'm just as anxious as you, were in this together, we need to work as part of a team to get through this. And it does make me feel better. Until next time he gets drunk and loses it at me.

Sorry he pushed you over a beer... It's not okay but we deal with it because it's all we know. Doesn't it suck when you feel like you can't even be that mad because you're drinking and fighting too... But like... I am still mad.

We quit for 2 weeks but then when we went back to drinking it got extremely out of hand. He raised his fist at me over my head for no reason but he was wasted. I thought he was going to hit me

My boyfriend and I quit last Oct at the request of his teenage daughter. He started running again, our relationship improved, and we were spending way less money.

Recently started drinking again. It has done nothing but cause problems. No amount of people telling you is enough. You will have to come to it on your own.

Your count of his threat of violence is concerning. That will likely escalate especially with alcohol as a factor.

I left a man five years ago that was physically and emotionally abusive alcoholic. I left him, he stalked me. Now I am involved with another alcoholic. We do this because it is a pattern.

I hope you break the pattern.

What’s going to happen next time you both get drunk and he hits or pushes you !??? Potentially you could be at risk of a very serious injury -
If you are alcohol dependant then not drinking a Monday or drinking light beer over the weekend is a method often used by us to excuse our behaviour and as a way to ignore/refuse:/lie to ourselves that the problem is getting worse because we feel that we can control the booze rather than it control us.....
Think about what it is you want out of life and then be responsible for the choices you make - it’s not easy but it’s achievable and if you’re alcoholic then the ONLY way is to abstain from booze altogether . There’s no middle ground with this disease - x

this is not hyperbole...........everything EVERYTHING has gotten better since I stopped drinking. Period. It seems you are fearful of quitting. Fearful of the unknown. Afraid of what will change. Don't be afraid of the wonderful sober life that awaits you which may or may not include your abuser. Surrender. Ask for help and get on this peaceful path with the rest of us. We saved a spot for you.

It’s true. Everything gets better. I reached a point where I admitted to myself that even one drink was just stringing me along. Once I let alcohol out of my life completely is when I found peace. There is no bargaining with myself constantly over planning a drink. That’s exhausting. And will keep you from growing into a better person.

Alcohol is a drug. It is a depressant. I thought I needed it to let loose, have fun, relax. In reality looking back now it was the root of many of my problems. I was full of anxiety, and depressed all the time. i was always on the edge of "losing it" of having a mental breakdown. it was on a Sunday morning that I decided I was tired of the way I felt bad ALL the time. I finally made a leap of faith and decided to leave the booze behind and give a sober life a try.

Best decision I ever made.

1is2many

well for starters, make your home a alcohol free zone, second you must be strong and kick the habit your self, These two things are the beginning, the longer you wait the harder quiting can be. please don't wait to long.