Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
In THAT moment when I realized I could not keep myself sober and I did not really want to die, but death seemed better than my condition...
I surrendered to "nothing". I gave up "trying" to keep myself sober because I realized I could not do it anymore.
I wanted to believe in a God that could and would help me, but ultimately it did not matter whether I believed or not. "I" could not do it, so I came to believe that there MUST be something or I was going to end up dead.
I surrendered to nothing, meaning I gave up MY will in that moment, and it wasn't until then that there was an opening for that "something" to enter in. I started praying to a power I could not even comprehend. I had just a tiny bit of hope that this mysterious power would save me.
I have heard people ask what is it like to surrender... To me it was like jumping off a cliff expecting to die but realizing I could fly, or stopping swimming imagining I would sink and drown then realizing that I could breathe underwater.
It felt like for the past 2 years trying to get sober, I was swimming upstream. I had periods of sobriety but I was miserable trying SO hard to stay that way. Drunk even seemed better than that struggle. After this "surrender" it feels now like I am still swimming but WITH the current.
How do you surrender to a power you don't believe in? You just DO because you are left with no other choice. Act "as if" or die.
That is what is was/is like for me.
I surrendered to "nothing". I gave up "trying" to keep myself sober because I realized I could not do it anymore.
I wanted to believe in a God that could and would help me, but ultimately it did not matter whether I believed or not. "I" could not do it, so I came to believe that there MUST be something or I was going to end up dead.
I surrendered to nothing, meaning I gave up MY will in that moment, and it wasn't until then that there was an opening for that "something" to enter in. I started praying to a power I could not even comprehend. I had just a tiny bit of hope that this mysterious power would save me.
I have heard people ask what is it like to surrender... To me it was like jumping off a cliff expecting to die but realizing I could fly, or stopping swimming imagining I would sink and drown then realizing that I could breathe underwater.
It felt like for the past 2 years trying to get sober, I was swimming upstream. I had periods of sobriety but I was miserable trying SO hard to stay that way. Drunk even seemed better than that struggle. After this "surrender" it feels now like I am still swimming but WITH the current.
How do you surrender to a power you don't believe in? You just DO because you are left with no other choice. Act "as if" or die.
That is what is was/is like for me.
I've definetly surrendered to being powerless *after* the first drink. I know I am.
I know that if left to my own "magical" thinking things get unmanageable. So when I get caught up in all that...I really try to turn it over. I'm a work in progress in that area among others.
Relate to those words Tara. I didn't even know I was surrendering, yet to anything. Finally just stopped struggling with myself and my life I was always fighting with. Surrender to me was final acceptance that not only had a serious problem, but I couldn't fix it on my own. More importantly, it was something 'I' wanted. Agree with Sticky, a great post and reminder Tara. Thank you.
I like what you said about "act as if" because that is what I had to do. I had to start taking actions that were suggested because I did not have anything to lose at that point and that is what I think I really was surrendering to - that willingness to give up trying to do it my way.