Prayer, meditation and my patience hat.

Hi Olive, Am basically in the same place as you being stuck. Managed to get some motivation from ppl here yesterday n got up n out of house, it felt good getting out and about. So am not letting that feeling go, Not using excuse of being Sunday (if it wasnt that would be something else).So am ready to jump in shower then head out to bootsale. dont want to but will . trying the fake it till i make it method. regards Kirrie

Oh not alone there HTL. Not just about laziness either, but the need to change old habits. We need to retrain ourselves in sobriety, and rehearse new routines over and over.Step outside our comfort zones, give up the self-pity and take responsibility for our lives. Change the why me's, to I can do this!!

"You can't solve a problem with the same level of thinking that created the problem." A.Einstein.

And that will take time and practice. Keep practicing new routines, and soon they will replace the old. Mix it up, and introduce some new enjoyable activities to your life. And do as your doing now, ask questions.

Actually Anna, just tonight I was talking with a friend who helped me break down some jumbled up stuff.... I'm going to write down each concern/problem, and take one little/medium/big task at a time.So rather than seeing it all together, in other words, I'm separating the mass of confusion into their own places. I'm thinking this will help a Lot. Actually, I already know it will.

oooooops sorry Anna

I'm stuck. NO routine. Haven't succeeded in WILLING myself to do anything I'm supposed to do even basic tasks like fix food, laundry, get the mail, clean house. I do some things but everything feels like such a difficult task. I can't explain well.

I feel like I can't move forward. Like there is something I haven't done that I need to do before I can start living. I have something preventing me from doing what I know I need to do.

Coog, I honestly think I am able to see my flawed thinking that is self pity. I don't feel self pity about this I don't think. I feel like there be some method to get myself moving again.

I dunno. I do feel kind of pathetic about it.

Thx drafter. I wonder if it is a lack patience. In my head, I feel like it a mountain in front of me and maybe I am just putting too much pressure on myself to climb it fast. If I could just relax and get it through my head that it's not a big deal... Seems so simple.

I've thunk it to death.

Kirrie. No worries. I was nicknamed olive on here because of my screen name :). Thank you for the encouragement. You sound like you will be able to get unstuck :). Will you drag me with you? Lol

ok realization... Thx Karen. Even though it seems like small everyday tasks, I think the feeling I have is "overwhelmed" like I have so far to go and so much I want to do that I can't find the motivation to take the first steps. I will write everything down tomorrow and try to make a plan. Lol... I have been trying even to that and get stuck. I think that needs to be where I start... Writing it all down. Ok.

How about commitment HTL. Are you committing to what you need to achieve each day. Where's your time being spent, and is it productive or delaying goals and contributing to the 'being stuck'.

With activities and fitness, I do the 10 minute commit rule. If at the end of 10 you still feel frustrated and stuck, okay, go do something else. Most of the time, I start, I keep going. It's getting started yeah. That's why I wrote GOYA all around my house lol. Even on the back of the dunny door.

Howto, I can't recall but I think I recall you're really early on in sobriety? I ask because at 11 years sober I can now look back and see myself in those early days (and I am an educated intelligent woman) and sitting on the edge of my bed in the mornings and not knowing what to do next: go to the toilet, have a shower, get dressed, brush my teeth, feed the cat, or all of the above?? My brain was so scattered and smashed from the damage I had done and the whirlwind of crap I had created in my life. But it truly does even out over time.

I think the suggestion about writing a list of everything coming into your head, and then prioritising, is a really good idea. I used to just grab an old envelope and do that, and also to write down feelings and your struggles with them - it helps get it out and you get even just a little relief, and do it again etc.

We all EVERYBODY goes thru days of not being able to focus or get what things together, not just us alkies - when i experience times like this, which i am experiencing now - if I WON'T DO WHAT I AM SUPPOSE TO DO, then whatever my butterfly train of thought is having me to - i still try to make it productive - if it's something of being lazy and doing nothing at all, then i remind myself - we all deserve lazy days now and then.

Peace!

In my early days, I would pray for things. When I say 'pray' it was for me after my gratitudes at night lying in bed...it was mentally praying.

ie. if I was having trouble at work with a particular person, I would 'pray for understanding' of that person.

If I was not able to get off my arse, I would 'pray' for courage and energy.

HP always miraculously answered my prayers (and still does). The most amazing thing :)

I could make a mountain out of a molehill in early sobriety. I had to get busy to keep myself out of my own head. That's where my problem was. Went to many meetings, talked with other alcoholics to find out what they did when this happened.

I could keep myself in a bad place for days when all I had to do was learn to laugh at myself and just let it go. I would get into the "what if's, I should have, I need to's, etc.

Then someone told me "if that's all you have going on right now, you're pretty lucky". Don't know why but that bad "place" vanished.

Hey Olive, have you considered that maybe you're not "stuck" but just that your life is relatively calm and it's not something you're used to so you're maybe a little bored?

You just finished writing your 4th step recently which keeps your mind going and brings out emotions and keeps you busy, once all that gunk is out-you may just be just "being". Took me a long time to realize that just "being" is okay. It's perfectly normal but we're just not used to it.

Evening out your ups & downs is a good thing! :) Just seems awkward and foreign to us...

Good points from HC...when we were drinking our lives were often chaos. Now there is a calmness but sometime its almost scary. One thing you might consider is a physical and mental check up...make sure you ARE healthy both mentally and physically...then you can take the small steps.
Pick just one thing from your list and DO it. If that is the only constructive thing you do that day....pat yourself on the back.! I'm off for a nice walk......hugs d

Step 7 - Humbly ask your HP to remove whatever it is that stands between you and your usefulness to your fellow alcoholics.

Also, instead of focusing on what is wrong with your current situation, ask instead what you can do for your AA group, another alcoholic, or someone around you.