Alcoholism Support Group

Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.

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Taradactyl 04/22/2010

Not feeling good lately here. My defense mechanisms are so close to the surface I feel I'm going to snap any minute. It is internal and stems from old feelings.

Thought I would try to turn a negative old thought to a positive. Sharing something very personal...

Grateful for my freedom and independence...

I was always a fighter as was my father... We butted heads a lot. Hard hard feelings there, BUT, he recognized a trait in me that was positive.

The very LAST communication my dad had with me before he passed was an email in which he said... "I christen you Anna 'Liberty' for your independent spirit... even if it is something we share just between the two of us. ...With all the love a father can have..."

My mom said "We trained you to be independent and confident and it hurt but that is what we wanted for you."

I have painful memories that I need to let go. Right now, for today, in THIS moment, I am letting it go. No more anger. No more guilt. No more self pity. For now, I am free.

I am grateful for what I have and who I am. I am grateful for what my parents gave me. I am blessed. I pray for forgiveness.

deleted_user 04/22/2010

What a blessing this post is! You have the eyes and heart to see another way to live outside of the pain you experienced...embracing the guidance, goodness and love in your family.

I love your spirit Anna. Sobriety is our only way to have these break throughs. I love witnessing healing taking place.

I'm so glad you shared it. Thank you. It really brightened my day :)

deleted_user 04/22/2010

Beautiful!

ExJerseyGirl2 04/22/2010

Thank you so much for sharing.

You turned my day around.

CoogeeMum 04/22/2010

Though their is sad and painful memories from my childhood, now and then I'll read something here and find there was also happy and loving moments. Thank you HTL :)

deleted_user 04/22/2010

Thanks for sharing this, Anna. I know I am working on the same thing myself. love and hugs xxx

deleted_user 04/22/2010

thanks...

jamesross 04/22/2010

Yea, sometimes we don't always understand things at the time. I remember having anger towards my father. Didn't really surface until years later while I was in a treatment center, and I didn't understand why it was surfacing. I learned, while growing up, that it wasn't right to have angry feelings towards your parents, so I had stuffed them and not allowed myself that. But when I honestly looked at it, I realized that my parents had done the best that they could, with what they knew. They were only human, and they made mistakes too, just as I had. We do need to forgive others, as well as ourselves. we don't set out with intentions of hurting others, but sometimes in life that happens. Sometimes it's because of our drinking, but other times drinking is not involved. Doesn't really matter. All I know is that I'm not that person anymore. The person that I was yesterday has changed today, hopefully for the better. I can't continue to beat myself up about the past. The past is history now, but I can learn from it and move foreward. Yesterday no longer exist, and it's pointless to continue to beat myself over something that no longer exist. The only thing I can do is learn from the mistakes of yesterday to better myself today, and live today as God intended me to be. I try. Wish ya the best. James

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