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Quitting smoking. Bad Idea?

Inputflangeman
Inputflangeman
Today is 14 weeks since my last drink and also the 14 week anniversary of the last time I saw or spoke to my wife of 1 year and best friend and soul mate of 6 years.

I have faithfully done my treatment, attend AA and, am finally accepting of step 1 and moving on to steps 2 & 3 with the help of my sponsor.

The last few months have been hell, although during my active addiction, that was no cake walk either and I don't want to go through that again. But, I miss my wife and kids horribly and there seems to be no stopping the divorce, and I have no way of communicating with her.

I met her in the gym, it was a real storybook, and today I would have been going for a long run with her and enjoying the scenery and the solitude of our run together. We did everything together. Our family business went out of business at the end of '13 due to losing our biggest customer, my father passed in 2009 and my first divorce has been a never ending saga as well.

My final vice is smoking. It's crazy, because I am a gym rat. I started after doing an Ironman triathlon in 2009 when my father passed away. My wife smoked up until a year ago as well.

I have been telling people I intend to quit on Monday. But frankly, I'm still so haunted and stressed out over the devastation of losing my wife and the other legal mumbo jumbo that is going on in my life, the business, etc... that I am afraid I am setting myself up for failure. My old addiction counselor said "bad idea in the first year". But, I don't need another enabler in my life. I feel weak for not having at least tried at this point because it just doesn't make sense, hurts my running and other activities, and is so darn expensive, which I don't need right now. Thoughts? Good idea? Bad idea? It almost feels like I'm getting ready to lose another friend...
deleted_user
deleted_user
Might be a good idea. I didn't quit - at least until they told me I had emphysema. You really don't want to deal with that...

Hugs,
Dennis
stickywick
stickywick
Good idea. Smoking will also kill you.
So live. Choose life. It might be uncomfortable but that will pass.
PJ54
PJ54
Maybe it would be better to concentrate on dealing with the alcohol issue first and not putting added pressure on yourself. What I have found is that a lot of other things got easier once I had achieved sobriety.
donttread
donttread
New research shows that smoking cessation in early recovery is not only not harmful to one's recovery, but likely helpful. Your counselor is behind the times.
Do some research for yourself. Better that getting well now to get sick again in ten years
deleted_user
deleted_user
I stopped smoking a long time before I successfully stopped drinking. However, here's a link that backs up dontread's reply, it may be of use to you

http://pubs.niaaa.nih.gov/publications/arh293/208-212.htm
Inputflangeman
Inputflangeman
Excellent article Antonia, and from a reputable source based on science. Tomorrow is the day. Just like my marriage, is nicotine really my best friend right now? I think not, I would take the former over the latter right now. Thanks again folks, great forum!
deleted_user
deleted_user
Take a gander at http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Smoking-Addiction/support-group
Tis another good group of people that can help you quit smoking...

Hugs
Community LeaderExJerseyGirl2
ExJerseyGirl2
IMO it is never a bad idea to quit smoking.
Deogee
Deogee
Input, do whatever you feel you can deal with at this point. No, you do not need another stressor, like quitting alcohol, at this point. Quitting smoking is absolutely the best choice at this juncture, but if quitting smoking might drive you to drinking, then for now, keep on smoking.

I assume you are talking about the nicotine habit?

I will just say that many times when I've had that craving for alcohol I would say to myself, "I would just be happy to have a half of cigarette."

I don't think your counselor is being an enabler. Why would she anyway? She has nothing to gain. There will always be another suffering alcoholic out there.

You are going through enough in your life right now to not have to worry about giving up smoking. One step, one day, at a time.

If you are like some addictive types and feel like you can give up all your addictions at one time, then that's great. But if not, don't put a lot of pressure on yourself thinking you have to. It only adds to the stress and causes more drinking.
donttread
donttread
Deogree do you realize that more alcoholics die from tobacco than from alcohol? We need to stop giving nicotine special treatment
Inputflangeman
Inputflangeman
I posted this in Breaking up and Divorce also, I got a ton of great advice, and some science from all of you. Of course their are going to be 3 opinions on it, one on each side and one down the middle. I think at this point, I have lived through so much, and it hasn't killed me yet. What's a little nicotine withdrawal for a few days. I am a planner by nature, so, I will have a plan and keep you all posted. I am thankful to each and everyone of you for the advice and taking the time to be constructive, considerate and thoughtful. The people of this group should be proud of themselves, I know I am. Thank you again.
donttread
donttread
Are you going to use Nicotine patches or gum?
Inputflangeman
Inputflangeman
I smoked for about 13 years before and quit for about 7 years when my 2 yo son came outside while I was having a cigarette and imitated my puffing. I put a patch on the next morning and later switched to gum and then one day said the hell with it, the urge is gone. I will probably do the same again. I read an article in Men's Health that said that the two in combination are the best chance of success. Of course, the warning labels say not to do this, but seriously, if you've ever been a smoker, who hasn't chain smoked before giving you even more nicotine at one time than if you had 10 patches on... I will also have to play it a little by ear. I remember the patch giving me some anxiety due to the stimulant, and with everything else going on, that may not be the best thing for me right now. I will take it just like my divorce, my recovery, and my attitude in life, one day at a time or less if necessary.
jstsng
jstsng
If you decide to do it, do it with patches. Gradually decreasing the amount of nicotine in you body is going to make it much much easier. That is what I did, had a short slip after a year and quit again with patches. Did not look back again (it turned out to be a lot easier than quit drinking, go figure?) I am not a fan of nicotine gums: you take them when you feel the urge and this rather reinforces the habit; the patches deliver a constant level of nicotine and cut your urges strenght and frequency). If you have to, double the time for each patch. By the way nicotine by itself is not cancerogenic (at least not solid evidence exists, it has other effects though.)
Wish you luck!
donttread
donttread
Many doctors approve the dual therapy that you are referring to.