They used to take people thru the steps in a day or a weekend. I think this is a bit extreme but whatever works. It took me about a year. This was with a slip after lying about completing amends. One, two and three are quick. Four and five are where the rubber meets the road and the healing begins. Accountability to G-d and another human being with rigorous honesty are key. There is no wrong fourth step except for the one never done. Do the best you can. The tenth is a daily fourth and it was recommended to do a daily fourth and fifth in detail to dig up any left over junk. I lied to myself for so long that I wound up believing the lies.

So back to amends. That was my largest hurdle. I was mad at my uncle for molesting me and I blamed my mom for letting him live with us. The anger and resentment hurt me. Now after talking it out, I have a decent relationship with my mom. My uncle is not my best friend but I do not wish he was dead so it is a work in progress. I do not feel like crawling out of my skin when I am in the same town as them anymore. It is truly liberating and the healing has begun.

After I used my sponsor went over all the steps again from the beginning. It was not too hard but I needed to get completely honest. I hope you find your way thru the steps with a good sponsor and some accountability from good friends.

Shawn

Good posts ... I love talking about the solution!

Really -- I think think the hardest step is 3 ... surrender my life and will???

Can't I just read a book and take a vitamin supplement?

;-)

I have no idea as I havent been in a 12 step program. I've read the responses though and I'm inspired! Thanks for the question...I'm going to look up the 12 steps today!

Great replies.Love the attitude about 12 steps.
Good peaceful day to all of you

If you relapse you definately need to get back to number 1, probably the most important of all the steps cause without it you won't be able to do the other steps any good. When you do the steps don't be so hard on yourself the steps are for life so do them the best you can as they are written and if you don't feel you did a step good enough go back to it and do it. Just keep it simple and don't over think the steps. take care.

...there is no length of time to do the steps, just do them to the best of your ability and keep going.

The way I did my steps, I did 1-9 and now I do 10,11, and 12 everyday for life. But if I do relapse and I pray i never have to go through that again, I will go back to step 1. 10,11, and 12 if you read them are all the first 9 steps rolled into 3 steps.