Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
This is my boyfriend's week to have his daughter. I adore that little girl. I love her just as much as if she was my own child. I had to work today so he asked if he could drive me and keep my car so he could go to his mother's and get her some clothes and her bed. He recently moved in with me, so he didn't have that stuff. I said, sure.
I know he has a drinking problem. I've been trying to help him with it. I've been trying to be supportive. I have never known him to drink when he's had his daughter. So I didn't even suspect that he would. I get off work and he's waiting outside. My boss had gone out before me and took my car keys away from him. He was drunk. I don't know what he did to draw my boss's attention to him. I'll deal with that tomorrow.
I was beyond furious. I have never been so angry in my life. I can't picture him every drinking and driving with that precious child in the car. I don't know for sure that he did - it is possible that he sat in the parking lot and got drunk and was sober when he drove to pick me up. I don't know and I'm not going to believe what he says.
I called his mother. She's picking his daughter up tomorrow. I'm telling him to get out. I'm telling him we're through. I told his mother about this. I'm going to tell him that he can call me if he gets sober and stays sober but I don't want to hear from him otherwise.
He will no longer have access to any vehicle. He can't be trusted.
I love him. I truly do. That's why I'm doing this. If he really loves me, he'll do the work to get sober. If not - well, I won't watch him go down that road. I told his mother that I will still be available to babysit anytime I'm not at work and I want to spend time with her. She's on board - she knows the child likes me and wants to see me. I don't want to remove myself from her life.
I'm sitting here crying, dreading what I'm going to have to do tomorrow. But I have to. I have to be strong.
Am I doing the right thing?
I know he has a drinking problem. I've been trying to help him with it. I've been trying to be supportive. I have never known him to drink when he's had his daughter. So I didn't even suspect that he would. I get off work and he's waiting outside. My boss had gone out before me and took my car keys away from him. He was drunk. I don't know what he did to draw my boss's attention to him. I'll deal with that tomorrow.
I was beyond furious. I have never been so angry in my life. I can't picture him every drinking and driving with that precious child in the car. I don't know for sure that he did - it is possible that he sat in the parking lot and got drunk and was sober when he drove to pick me up. I don't know and I'm not going to believe what he says.
I called his mother. She's picking his daughter up tomorrow. I'm telling him to get out. I'm telling him we're through. I told his mother about this. I'm going to tell him that he can call me if he gets sober and stays sober but I don't want to hear from him otherwise.
He will no longer have access to any vehicle. He can't be trusted.
I love him. I truly do. That's why I'm doing this. If he really loves me, he'll do the work to get sober. If not - well, I won't watch him go down that road. I told his mother that I will still be available to babysit anytime I'm not at work and I want to spend time with her. She's on board - she knows the child likes me and wants to see me. I don't want to remove myself from her life.
I'm sitting here crying, dreading what I'm going to have to do tomorrow. But I have to. I have to be strong.
Am I doing the right thing?
Hopefully everything will work out for you and your boyfriend. He will have a better chance of sobriety if he learns more about alcoholism and about ways that he can change his thinking. If AA is not an option there are alternatives that may be worth checking out. I do not know much about either of the options listed below but some people here say that they have worked for them. I think that SMART involves going to meetings but others who are more familiar with it may correct me on that. Obviously, Carrs book can be read anywhere and does not involve meetings.
SMART Recovery:
www.smartrecovery.org/
Allen Carrs Easy Way To Stop Drinking:
www.allencarr.com/29/easy-way-to-control-alcohol