No, you are not awful. You suffer from a chronic and fatal disease. You need to seek treatment for your disease.

Well, you are still lucky to be alive and not in jail.

Take notice of the things to be grateful for and clean yourself up. The relationships can be repaired. Maybe not all of them, but you will be a better friend and lover to others and most importantly you will love yourself more!

Hello Alylove,

One of the things that alcoholism does is that it distorts reality, leading to wrong thinking. This causes many alcoholics to wrongly conclude that they are bad people and that the future is hopeless.

Like you, I knew that I had to stop but quickly realised that it was impossible for me to do it on my own. I did not want to seek help but I knew that it was either that or destruction. I definitely did not want to go anywhere near meetings of Alcoholics Anonymous but when everything else failed; I went to an AA meeting. That was nine years ago and up until today, I have not taken another drink.

AA will work for you too if you are desperate enough to do whatever it takes. The result is an unbelievable, free, and sober life. The past is gone and cannot be undone – what are you going to do about the future?

Following up on what Jeff said: My drinking made me do some pretty horrible things so the cop gave me a choice of jail or detox. I chose detox because I had enough. There was no place for me to go. So I had a Police escort to the emergency room, was put in detox for 4 days, from there I went into a 3 week IOP (Intensive Outpatient Program) and from there I went into more counseling but through all the treatment I had, AA meetings were a requirement. That was 9 years ago. Today I have a great life and I have never been happier!

I could not have quit on my own. I needed help and I knew I needed help but was too ashamed to ask for it. So don't drown in your self pity, don't focus on the past, This is the first day of the rest of your life.

In the words of Mother Theresa "“Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. We have only today. Let us begin.” Make this a day you will remember for the rest of your life. Make this day, July 16, 2017, the first day of sobriety and build on it from here on out. You can be an example for others to follow!

A good place to start is with your doctor, your primary care physician who will discuss available treatment options for you. In the end it's your decision and I hope you make the right one.

We will keep you in our thoughts and prayers.

God Bless

You're not awful at all but you are in the depths of this progressive illness. You say you know what to do to stop so what's stopping you?? You can stop if you really want to and the best way to stop and stay stopped is with support. What support and or programme is up to you to seek out. If you want a sober, happier and fulfilled life then you've only one choice because the other choice of continued drinking will lead to depravity, unhappiness, depression and at worse death.

Professional help. Inpatient treatment. Follow up care. AA.
There is no shame in needing help.

It is possible to put it away and get back to life. Cmon!
1is2many