The first line in More about Alcoholism, out of Alcoholics Anonymous is "most of us have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics." I know that was the case with me. It goes on to say that no person wants to admit they are different, and it also goes on to say that we will try to prove the fact, that we are suffering from alcoholism, wrong. I remember early in life times when I would dream about being able to drink, certain that I would control it and there would be no problems. The literatrue calls it an illusion, to think we can drink normally, and it says many lose their lives from it.
For me this is the beginning of the steps, were I fully concede to the idea or belief that I am an alcoholic, that will never change, my body does react differently, my mind as well, and going forward, alcohol will not be part of my life. Once I did believe that, everything else fell into place and being able to not drink, was possible.
I know I'm bragging but....I made the best persimmon pudding I have ever had in my life. It disappeared in one night.I think the secret is separating the ingredients into 3 bowls and beating the buttermilk and soda before adding to the fruit/sugar/egg mixture, then adding that to the dry sifted ingredients. My dad always liked to spread butter on his persimmon pudding, which was dryer like bread....