For certain, from my point of view, taking that first sucker drink would be a mistake. I have practiced some "flipping" in my 10 1/2 years of sobriety...trying to see a situation differently, as most of my life I tended to see things in the negative. For example, using your situation, I might try: I HAVE a job, I LIKE the new monthly income, I am facing and working through some fears instead of drinking or drugging or otherwise numming out. I do not do too much asking God what His will is for me these days, since God...God as I understand God...always wins out. I remain a "Pray to God but row like hell to shore" AA.

they say do not quit a job until another job is already in hand....so doing due diligence to secure a new job should be on your short list of to do items......hugs bill

Every time I listened to my ego, it always got me in trouble. It got to the point where I had had enough so I just accepted the fact that my life was a total disaster and it was in that acceptance, the wheels of recovery began turning to take me in the right direction.

I got a new job which I loved,....I had money coming from places I never expected, .....and my relationships improved....so in other words, "God was doing for me, what I could not do for myself.". Life got better....much better from that point on. ....All of the AA 12 Promises have been fulfill in my life. I will reprint them here for you:

1. If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are halfway through. This promise states that people who complete the AA program and make a sincere effort will begin to see changes in their lives even before they are halfway done.

2. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness. People who finish the steps will experience relief from the suffering of addiction and feel free to pursue a new life without alcohol.

3. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it. Those who work the program will gain a sense of acceptance that allows them to process their experiences, learn from them, and move on without guilt.

4. We will comprehend the word serenity, and we will know peace. Addiction can lead to a constant state of inner turmoil. The AA program helps people find a calmness that is rare during active using, and that many addicts have never known in their lives.

5. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. Many addicts don’t believe that other people understand what they’ve been through. But in AA, they often meet people who can identify with and learn from their experiences.

6. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. Addiction makes users feel worthless and guilty about their actions. The steps can give people a sense that their lives have a meaning and a purpose, particularly through helping others.

7. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Addiction leads to many self-centered behaviors. Helping other people find recovery can bring addicts outside of themselves and help them develop a genuine interest in other people.

8. Self-seeking will slip away. The tunnel vision of focusing only on oneself and drinking usually begins to fade as people work the steps.

9. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change. AA can shift one’s perspective from hopeless to hope. People can begin to imagine a life where they are happy.

10. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. Alcoholics who recover through AA don’t feel like they have to hide anymore or worry about how to support their addiction and maintain financial security.

11. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. As the AA member gets deeper into the recovery process, they begin to see situations more clearly and can tap into their inner resources.

12. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves. The concept of a higher power is central to AA. This higher power, be it God or something else, becomes a guiding force in the person’s life.

Agree. Ego is the issue and you can’t be blamed for it. Find a new job while you endure this one. No loss of income. Hang in there

I quit the job. I know it was the right thing to do. I let the money thing go too. With the removal of the crippling stress I now see in order for me to have kept that job, I would have had to go to less meetings at my home group, would have had to be tired, lonely, angry, and hungry a lot, and would have had to withstand resentment for sustained periods using my own devices, which presently are not nearly strong enough spiritually as they would have had to be. I also saw my demands for food, cars, a social life, cash, sex, were all more important than humility. I’m grateful it’s over, that was not me, and I look forward to finding me again by putting spirituality first by going back to the basics, and letting go of what my ego is suggesting I acquire.