Beth, it may not be necessary to end friendships, just steer clear of them and drinking situations for a bit until you can get a foothold in sobriety. My best friend also drank copious amounts and we enabled each other quite a bit, but I reckon I pushed it on her more. When I stopped drinking, we didn't go out like we used to and opted for lunch at a cafe instead. We get together more now, but she drinks nowhere near what she used to when we were around each other. Build some solid foundations in your sobriety. Those who care will give you space and still be around. If they've got a problem with you bettering yourself and wanting to make change, then they're probably best left behind.

I think you can still be friends with the friends that are supportive or at least understanding that you aren't going to ever be drinking with them anymore.

I'm still friends with my best friend, we use to drink together all the time and now we just do other things. She would never once try to talk me into drinking. Explain the facts and go from there as to your best course of action.

Hi Beth,

I really admire you being willing to do what it takes to stay sober - that is the path to success.

I agree with Coogee and Aussie, start by telling your friends you no longer drink and then play it from there. You may be surprised at their reaction. When I told my circle I quit, a couple of people opened up about their own worries about drinking and even expressed admiration.

You have gotten great advice here. There is no reason for you to stop being with your friends. Tell them that you have stopped drinking alcohol. A glass of tonic water with a slice of lime is refreshing. If you don't make a big deal of not drinking liquor, your friends will party as before. I never drank alcohol and have been in bars and parties over the years and had a ball. No one ever said anything about me ordering iced tea or ginger ale.

Your aim is to be healthy and happy. Less said the better in a crowd - just go out and socialize and have fun.

At one time, my sister had the same problem. She had to remove herself from people who were not a good influence on her. It's hard enough to stop drinking, much less being around people who drink.Join A.A. it saved my sister's life. You need a support system, and work the 12 steps. My sister has been a recovering alcohlic for 14 years now, and I am so proud of her. She stiil attends A.A. meetings every week. My sister would not be here today, if she did'nt get help. There is happiness without drinking...You are stronger than you think you are...

The question you might want to ask yourself, do you want to stay sick with your friends your talking about or want a life free of staying sick?

Most of our "drinking buddy's" disappear when we what to get well because many have issues themselves and don't want to deal with it.

Beth, don't worry. Life long freinds can go for months without seeing our talking to each other and not even question it, and then one calls the other and they just carry on as if they just seen each other yesterday. They know the other one is there for them regardless of distance or how often they talk. There's probably very few friends that you're like that with. I have only one of them myself. But if these folks are those kind of friends, they'll have no problem with ya avoiding them until you have a strong grip on sobriety. If not, then they're replaceable anyhow. Good luck to ya

Hard stuff! I've found that some of my best friends, who I've known for years, been pregnant at the same time, gone through super happy and devastating times...are still my friends. They don't understand fully, but they do support my sobriety now that they know I'm serious about it. Of the six or so of us, I suspect several others are alcoholics but it's not up to me to diagnose. I'm here if they want to discuss stopping and they know that. They would actually probably prefer I drink with them, but that's cause they are still living that life.
Anyway, do what you need to do to do to protect your sobriety above all.