Well said Serenity. I feel the same about the Big Book. I have ready it dozens of times and it's so weird, each time I read it it seems like somone has come in and changed the words! I know it's the prism you spoke about and also each time I read it, I am a new person, ever evolving, because I stay sober and do the work. I have infinite opportuntities because of that.

I think you're over-complicating things. I have heard people share that after 10 years they thought they had things figured out, and 5 years after that they realized how naive they were.

Don't worry about it. Just do the best you can each day. Progress is progress. Forget about perfection and "getting it". It's a never ending journey that we're on, and each of us takes a slightly different path.

It's common for people to try to do the 12 steps perfectly. I suggest doing them quickly, and then redoing them over and over throughout the rest our lives. Too many people do step 1, 2, 3, and relapse, then 1, 2, 3 again, and relapse. Do all 12 steps quickly, and then worry about doing it better after. Find a sponsor that has the time to do all 12 steps with you in 4 weeks, not 4 years.

I can relate to what everyone is saying.

Cendres... Not worried at all about getting it. Like someone said above... I think once you imagine you've got it, "it" is gone. I think it is a process of doing not getting. I receive my sobriety when I do what I am supposed to do. I am trying to live well and appreciating my sobriety without taking it for granted.

Was a rough couple days for me but by doing the right things and talking to the right people, I am turning it around. A year ago, I couldn't do that. So I am making progress. I am fairly I will never stop learning.

Cendres, you said it about getting the first round of the steps done ASAP, do your best with it, then do them again and again and over time, everything that's supposed to come to the surface and be dealth with, will. It's such a gift that we can do the steps, all the way through forever.