hey dipso, welcome back. are you still drinkin now? what's your plan?

Well technically you didn't throw everything away,you still have everything but sobriety and that can be back in this moment and on and on moment by moment. My last relapse I picked up a drink and didn't set it down for 5 years, it was a big drink. If you made 8 months you musta been doing something right. Get back to it and maybe add a little. Want a lot. Want it all.

There is a story of Socrates testing the true intent of a youth who came to him for instruction. He wanted to see if this young man had the resolve to search for Truth. He took the youth to the river, and, after wading into the water, asked the young man to follow. Once they were waste deep, Socrates suddenly took hold of the fellow and held him under the water. Naturally, the youth soon began to struggle for air. Socrates then lifted him from the water and said, "When you fight for truth as you fight for breath, come back and I'll teach you."--Steve Hagen

I encourage you to read this and substitute sobriety or being clean for the word Truth. I believe we must be willing to fight for this as we would our last breath of air whike drowning. For this exactly what is happening to us. Thank you.
Namaste

i know that feeling very well...many times i've woken after a binge, not remembering alot of my antics, and wishing i could forget the bits i could. dont give up mate, seriously. whenever i screw up, i just tell myself that this aint thhe first time ive felt so bad about what id done and that things did get better. people forget, you wont forget but it will become less painful to remember. be humble, and remember that you wouldnt have acted like such a tit if it wasnt for the drink. hope this makes sense...x

It's oK to be angry. But you must forgive yourself and move on back to sobriety. You did it for 8 months so obviously you are strong enough to do it again.

Well dipso-all your feelings are valid-it is despicable behavior, I trust you are aq mess, and your anger at yourself is well founded perhaps.

I do not think you have thrown everything good in your life away-yet. I mean, you typed that message so I assume you are still breathing? And when there is life there is hope....

Your alcoholic brain tells you that there is none however so you will continue on your downward spiral.

I should add that if you continue your last statement will be true-it is up to you dipso. And believe me, I have been there a thousand times. Get up, GET UP!

What do you mean you have thrown everything away? You still have your life. You had 8 months sobriety, no-on can take that away. And you can interrupt this relapse at anytime. Sure, your a mess, but you can change that. Like KK said, 'up you get', and take some action. We'll all support you along the way yeah. Coogee xxx

sorry to hear you feeling so low-

easi does it but do it-this is a lifetime deal in the big picture-we have an incurable disease,you can pick your sobriety back up-

I understand how you feel i've relapsed many times,10 months was a relapse that lasted 3 years!

you know what ?

The jaws of addiction opened up aand had you for a night -

your back you got free of the repacious creditor Alcohol-which will and does refund our misery in full everytime without fail-

I was in hospital last week,met a man who was having a brain tumour removed the next day-50% chance of dying on the operating table-

And if it was succesful he mite still die anyway if they did'nt get all the tumour out-

our disease is very manageable-
look at the positives dont let on slip drag you back!

To say you broke after 8 months indicates that you had fixed something. the reality is you had simply treated an internal problem with a band aid.
Stopping drinking was only taking care of a symptom of your disease the real treatment begins when you start dealing with the real problem which is you.
Electric shock doesn't cure heart disease and not drinking doesn't cure the alcoholic. You must open up and get inside to make complete repairs.
There is a way to not only not drink but eventually not want to drink.
You know what it is.
So your white knuckles gave out. Why not get take the chance of scraping them up a little and plunge into some real recovery.
God Bless