Self contained and self satisfied and thin skinned is not very open minded wouldn't you agree?
Billy

Post no 25 wasn't an accusation or dig Buck, it was an open question :)

There are always lots of opinions...and that's ok :) Sometimes it's worth investigating the reasons why we have them, telling the difference between our own and ones we pick up from other people :)

P

I like hot button topics , it gives the board some blood in the veins.
But as Freud says it ALL relates back to my mother. I didn't believe this and would always scoff when my sponsor said this... But it was true. My mom was a sweet loving woman but harbored me from the world and instilled fear in me rather than coping skills. It wasn't her fault as I was born 12 yrs after my brother. I was a blessing... Never called an accident. I also was born after a miscarriage of my sister. So I was constantly under scrutiny at each cold. I can remember getting a high fever and her putting me in a ice tub and lawd help if I didn't crap on time...get out the Emma. I see these as the why I drank to escape. Why I found that ease and comfort the the bottle of schnapps offered.
I didn't feel I was worthy and I felt that I was a weak person
By delving into this with the help of the 12 steps I don't have to be that way anymore. I am a strong person, I am worth it and you are too
1-2

This is what you said Paul:

"What's clear again is you have a need to have them fall in line with your opinion, for some reason it's really important to you and the denial around this is so strong you're projecting the same emotions on to everyone else".

That was not a dig Paul? I have no interest in having others "fall in line with my opinion". I could honestly care less if you or others want to serve and give alcohol to your potentially alcohol addicted friends and relatives, but I thought it was an honest and interesting question to bring up. You obviously took offense to the question and decided that I must have something in my past that makes me want to "fix" other people. You even sent a link to an article on people who have a compulsion to "fix" other people.

I don't want or need any personality analysis from you Paul. Stick to the topic and stay away from the personal comments and insinuations. Or hit the blue button and ignore it all.

All good and all gravy :)

I do think it pays to look in to whys and wherefores...especially for patterns of behaviour we find ourselves compelled to repeat, or when the same situation pops up again and again :)

On topic sometimes I might be comfortable serving booze, sometimes not...all comes down to my choices and preferences...hopefully free of outside influences and things below the surface, If I take the time to be aware of what they might be.

There is no hypocrisy there for me...because not drinking is a personal choice and necessity...at no time did I decide drinking was a bad choice for anybody else.

P

My family doesn't know I quit drinking, so I am sure I will receive alcohol as a gift from someone, usually my dad gets everyone a bottle of wine. He usually picks them out because there is something on the bottle that reminds us of him, I will give it to my sister to drink, then save the bottle. I also have bourbon in my freezer that I use to cook caramel with, so if anyone comes over I can offer them bourbon, but I have no desire to drink it luckily. But thats just me, I know for some people keeping it in the house, or stepping in to a liquor store is too much temptation.

It stops being a temptation once you believe alcohol is a harmful substance if ingested in any amount. At least it did for me.

My question was aimed more at how you feel about fueling other people with alcohol during the holidays. Since I now believe it is a harmful substance for all humans to ingest, I have a hard time justifying providing it for others. Especially for those people I know tend to get bombed on a regular basis, like I did.

Buck, you have 5 months of sobriety! Some of the people you are preaching to have 20 years plus! I had 8 years! Don't think it can't or won't happen to you! I had 8 years before my pedestal got kicked out from under me! I would stick to your own problem and not worry about everyone else! I am on day 1 again!

Ted, I am not even sure what you find offensive in my post. Can you be more clear so I understand what your issue is? I never said it can't happen to me. I know full well it could. And I am not trying to tell anyone else what to do. I am only relating my own concerns about serving alcohol to people I know are already addicted. That is a serious concern for me and I have the right to express that concern, or maybe in your mind I don't because I only have 5 months of sobriety under my belt? I try to respect everyone on this discussion board, not just those with years of experience staying sober.

I am sincerely sorry you had a relapse Ted, but I am not your enemy.