Yeah you said all that needs to be said, keep trying new meetings untill you find a nice one for you. You should be proud of yourself for making the right choices. Here is a cyber pat on the back for you, well done, keep up the good work and congratulations for your sobriety time.

I went to my 5th AA mtg tonite. A Beginner's mtg were I and one other of 23 people were less than a year., They spent the hour on the 2nd step and I left SO provoked about the emphasis on God and the need for anyone drinking to "get it" that only God could keep us from drinking. I am going to try other meetings, but this was just NOT what I thought.

Will chalk it up to the wrong chemistry for me, but yikes. Will try one more week's of mts at diff places. it's only fair to give it a try. But you know, there ARE people who are not into God. I truly cant believe that all of AA expects us to espouse something in which we do not believe. And so, I will try the next town tomorrow.

Liz

keep going and you'll find your niche. i go to meetings at a very low bottom detox. i prefer that because the old timers and the other folks that attend do so because they truly want to help "the suffering alcoholic achieve sobriety." there have been some meetings i've attended that i would not wish for anyone first walking in the doors.

Go to more meetings and remember this is a way of life you just don't go to a meeting and you will be ok, and it's also what you put into the meeting that counts more then what others say.

Maybe you should Chair the meeting as to be in pseudo control of everyone else including yourself.

You consider yourself non judgmental? LOL!

Good luck on your next meeting. Maybe they will all be just like you!

Hahhaaaa!

Thanks, I think I will try another. On the God thing, I also didn't mention that that was a stumbling block for me. I do believe in God but in a very different sense (I am Pagan), and no matter how many times people tell you a "higher power" can be anything you believe in you can't deny that the steps are of a fundamentally Christian paradigm. I don't, for example, believe in a God that can remove my "defects," but I do believe that faith can help me overcome any challenge. There is much else... but I am ranting, so I'll stop. I am trusting there is a way I can adapt the interpretation without losing the essence of it. Or I'll find something else!

ElenaM and StayStrong4, CONGRATULATIONS on taking the big step of going to meetings! It really does take a lot of courage and humility to do that.

For some people, it takes some time, and different meetings, to feel at home and "belonging." I think the best advice I heard was to look for similarities, not differences; and to listen to the feelings being expressed, rather than the specific stories, or rants, or bullshit a person is telling.

Remember the "beginners" aren't just those at their first meetings. Oldtimers are beginners, too. We all begin again every day, if we really want to keep our recovery.

Many people say they "clicked" when "I first heard someone else telling my story" -- that's when they really felt deep down they were not alone, and that someone truly understands.

The God thing was a BIG problem for me. It sure as hell was not something I was going to swallow in one big chunk. I suggest reading "To The Agnostic" in the Big Book; and the chapters on Step 2 and Step 3 in the "12 Steps and 12 Traditions." It seems to me that AA actually was designed by and for drunks like us who have a big problem swallowing the God thing. :) These chapters helped prepare me to be receptive when God reached out, grabbed me, and dragged me kicking and screaming into His loving, protective embrace.

I too, was one of those that was totally put off by all the "God" stuff at first.
Along with the the chapter "We Agnostics", I found the Appendice II-"Spiritual Experience", in the back of the Big Book, on pages 567 and 568 to be very helpful.
It helped me sort out the spiritual stuff, along with time, and evolving into my concept of something greater than myself.
I feel that to try and "get it", whatever "it" is, rapidly, and to someone else's ideal, was distracting me from getting on with the business of recovery.
Once I relaxed about that part, and felt I didn't have to live up to someone else's concept, I began to recover.
Hope it helps!

Remember you will find a a bunch of alkies at AA meetings, about all of them are just like you, with different characted defects. YOU HAVE to try to go to different ones. It takes at least 6 mos. to start feeling comfortable at regular attended meetings.. There are cliques.
Don't go in there with a smile acting like everything is fine. That will show your sincerety, and the ol' timers will take notice.. Bring up a topic such as that, and let them share their experience strength and hope.

good job walking in the door, Elena!

also maybe look for a women's group. i prefer them, and i'm glad that it was my first meeting because for me they just make me feel more comfortable.

if you have lots of groups near where you live, try different ones. of the handful of groups/clubs around my area, several of them just don't suit me at all.

on another note... i don't think there is any need to get sarcastic in post replies when people share their feelings on being hesitant about AA... i realize that it may have saved you, but can you just recognize the possibility that it is not easy to get indoctrinated right off the bat... especially if the person has fundamental beliefs that differ or if a person stumbles upon a group or a meeting that just doesn't work for them???

Elena,

I want to apologize for being sarcastic. I felt like you were being judgmental & critical. For some reason I became defensive. I'm not sure why your post struck me negatively the way it did, but evidently I was the one with the problem - not you. I support you in your journey with sobriety. I really do. Never give up! You are not alone. Don't let my dumb a** discourage you! Peace & ease

It is a really good idea to get to different types of meeting as they can vary so widely. Try to remember that you will feel like you are in an alien culture for a while because you don't yet speak 'AA speak'. Be patient - meetings are often different from one week to the next let alone those that are in different places!

Please believe me when I tell you that you do NOT have to believe in the 'Christian God' - you just DON'T. People in the meetings may make it sound that way but look at what the Big Book says about it.

It is true that a lot of the language used in the BB has m ore that a slight Christian slant, but try to remember the time in which it was written - no one would (I suspect) have ever admitted to anyone that they were pagan when AA first began - those guys had probably never met anyone from a different religion or belief system, yet they still knew instinctively that AA had to be available for ALL. They wrote in the language with which they were familiar.

From what I have read, the meetings in the US often have a more Christian bias than meetings over here in the UK but please don't give up on AA simply because you feel like you don't fit - it's a pretty common feeling with us anyway!

Stick around, try different meetings and hopefully, you will find somewhere that you can feel at home. Other than that just emigrate over here!! LOL

The most important thing to me is what can I bring to a meeting not just what I can get out of it. I take what I need and leave the rest behind. Meetings talk about a higher power and the God of your understanding only. I wish you luck and just be open-minded.

I found that(when I was still doing AA)going to meetings at unusual times ie early morning saturdays and friday evenings, sunday mornings.
That is not a sentence, forgive me. I found people more dedicated to their sobriety. They were a group of people that had formed a society somewhat. The other good reason was I usually found something to do that was sober. At times, it might be helping someone move or find out that someone else was having a cookout or that a group of people were meeting at a park. I found a lot of really good friends that way.

I had to try about 10 different meetings before I found one that I liked. Lucky for me there were about 50 meetings in my area so I had lots to choose from.

I still find that I like about 1 in 10 of the new meetings that I try. Don't judge them all by your first one.