This is a trait of many who abuse substances. I have this fear that I have been told is projecting and it's an unhealthy thing and I shouldn't do it. I have fears of tomorrow and what may or may not happen and it plays a lot of time in my head. The fix for me is to take a breath and tell myself that this is unhealthy pehavior and then to find about five things I'm greatful for. My finding the good has a way of getting the bad thoughts out.

The first thing is that you are recognizing these thoughts and the next thing is an action.

1is2many

If the irrational fear persists after two weeks of sobriety, talk to you doctor. The fear my be a symptom of an underlying problem that was masked by the alcoholism, or it could be something that will go away as sobriety continues. Only a doctor can tell, Be honest with the doctor about your alcoholism. This will aid in the diagnosis.

I drank to numb my feelings so I couldn't feel. When I stopped drinking I felt a rush of feelings I had stuffed, come to the surface. It was the support I received through the 12 steps of AA that helped me deal with them.

There is a good book that will help you called "The 12 steps for anyone who really wants them" which is the AA 12 steps written for EHA (Emotional Health Anonymous) which helped me tremendously! If you trust me with your address, I will send you a free copy. If not then I totally understand. You can buy it used on amazon for $4-$5 used if you are interested. It walks you through each of the steps in easy to understand language and gives you practical application techniques which will help you deal with your fears. I highly recommend.

God Bless

Hello Candi,

Fears, whether genuine or imagined, are very real to the person who is experiencing them. However, there are strategies that we can employ that will lead to freedom from fear.

The Serenity Prayer conveys a simple but valuable tactic that can be utilised at once, regardless of whether you believe in God or not (Non-believers can substitute ‘Spirit of the Universe, Inner Spirit etc.”. for God).

“God grant me the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change”.
Accepting the sentiment expressed in this simple sentence can eliminate a great deal of fear. For example, I used to be worried sick about things such as foreign wars, famine and other such occurrences that I had absolutely no control over. Once I accepted that I cannot change those things, a lot of fear disappeared.

“The courage to change the things I can”.
Sometimes people will stay in a particular situation when it would be better to move on. It takes courage to make difficult or uncomfortable decisions that may involve short term pain but it is better in the long run to make those decisions.

“And the wisdom to know the difference”.
This is where being tuned into the inner spirit can bring great rewards.

Another useful tactic for dealing with fear is to try and live in today. We tend to needlessly worry about things that may never happen, weeks, months, or years down the road and this is just a useless strain on mental health. It is fine to plan for tomorrow, but good to live in today.

A common fear that many have concerns what other people think about us. The way to overcome this fear is to become happy with who we are. This is a fear that I had for many years, but not anymore. For example, I would be afraid walk across a crowded room in case people would be looking at me. As a direct result of trying to live by the principles outlined in the AA Twelve Steps, I can now accept the person that I am, so what other people think is not so important.

I have also observed that no matter what you do, some people will not be satisfied and they will find something to criticise. Better I think to please yourself, while trying to be kind and considerate towards others. There is one powerful thing that I learned in AA, that is difficult to take on board, but that is also hugely liberating and is this: “What other people think about you is their business, not yours”.

Finally, Step 4 of the AA Twelve Step programme of recovery devotes a section to fear on pages 67 and 68. (You can buy the Big Book online, at AA meetings or also read it for free online).

The AA approach assumes a belief in a God of your understanding and there is a prayer that deals with fear, that goes as follows:

“We ask Him to remove our fear and direct our attention to what He would have us be. At once, we commenced to outgrow fear”.

This AA suggestion requires not only a belief in some sort of God, but also an acceptance of God’s will.

Emotions such as fear cannot just be wished away and that is why there is much to be gained by working on the AA Twelve Steps with the aid of a competent sponsor.

Thank you all for the advice. Today is better but this is definitely something i need to work on a lot more. I know that many of the things I fear I have no control over, I just need to keep remembering that.

I will check out the books mentioned also thank you for the recommendations......always looking for new stuff to read and help keep me sober.