Alcohol stopped working for me, and stopped being my buddy. In fact, it became a poisonous snake and bit me!

About 18 months ago, my heart started to pound like a jackhammer everytime I sobered up. In fact, my system seemed like it was on constant overload. The last time it really happened was Memorial Day weekend in '07. My left arm went numb, my heart went nuts, and I couldn't even hold a glass of water. When my little event ended, I had lost a lot of cooridination and had trouble with balence for about 6 weeks. I couldn't drive a car over 45mph or I felt like I was going to crash. This was my wake-up call, but I still drank but on a scaled back level - till my right side (torso) started to give me constant pain. I went sober for 2 months, then got a CT scan, which diagnosed me with fatty liver. That was enough to make me stop for a sustained period.

I don't want to die from this. It finally became real.

Alcohol almost killed me, I ended up in jails and institutions cause of alcohol, when I got sober this time I was literally in bed for 3 months cause I was so sick and found out I have a liver disease, but am beating it, I am 22 months clean and sober and I owe it to the 12 steps of AA, I had a resentment towards AA for years that damn near killed me, I was in AA in 1989 and stayed sober for several years then was going back and forth for awhile, I definately learned what not to do, and today I enjoy being sober and just hanging out with my gf. Take care on what you decide, alcoholism is a fatal disease you can believe that, anybody tells you it is not is full of bs.

I went to rehab but I don't think it really helped. I decided I finally liked AA and wanted what AA people had.....I get my 30 day chip Friday and I'm so excited as well as my family is. Makes us all happy. Good luck to you; it's a hard decision and the road is bumpy but you can do this.

I had a huge drinking problem. And an even worse quitting problem. I was always one to work the steps and the program half-measured with my own intellegent thinking. Thinking that wound me up into the past life I've lived. But that life is the biggest asset I take with me to helping others.

The final straw came when I was arrested and facing some long time...this being my third trip to prison. I can remember my first night in my cell thinking of who I was going to try to con to bail me out because all I wanted to do was drink. Reality hit me moments later and I got on my knees and prayed. That was like a huge turning point in my life. I reached out to God and the tears came and from that day on I've been sober. It started with me in prison and continued on with me as a free man. Enough finally became enough.

For me it was turning 30 years old....it hit me, I was wasting my life drinking....I was not where I wanted to be, I just kind of stepped back and this has to stop....I was not who I wanted to be, and alcohol was taking so much from me....
I have only drank once sense than(3 months) but I am not in a good place...I need to start doing more....going to more meetings, counseling and maybe out patient treatment....but I need to be doing lots more than I am doing now...I drank last night for no real reason....I sure gave myself some though.....
so, I need to stop talking and start doing more

Lets see, I came into AA because someone brought me, I didn't thinK I had a problem, I was drinking daily, and most days I would pass out from drinking, I managed somehow to keep my job, and my house, I guess losing those was a YET (Your Eligible Too) for me, but I saw the smiles on peoples faces, and got into the steps right away, and realized there was a better way to live, I had never really been taught how to live, grew up in an alcohoic home, and kind of got lost, I am one of 14 children. We were all kind of lost, some worse than others, but being sober, taking responsibility for my actions, and working the steps into my life one day at a time, and Sober is so much better, I can see clearly, all I can suggest you do , is to keep coming, and do the things others tell you to, YOUR best thinking got you to where you are, let someone with a clear head lead you in the right direction till you can make decisions for yourself! It works if you work it! Really it does!

"...what it was that finally made you say this it?"

Divine intervention....or if you prefer an act of Providence (look that up in the dictionary)

"And how did you change things, in the beginning?"

After 17 days sober I found a sponsor in AA...worked the steps "PRECISELY" as it says in the book Alcoholics Anonymous and changed completely in 72 days.

"was it just going to AA and keep on going, or did you go to rehab?"

No rehab. Went to A.A. and kept going until I hated A.A. then I kept going until I love it.


"or was there just that moment that you knew?"

The minute God revealed Himself to me...I knew I would never drink again! I was standing in His grace, mercy, and most of all....His LOVE! I was changed forever.

Guru

I love your status, Ashley. "I think I can" was all I was saying to myself today....It caught me off guard when I read your profile. I am not fully recovered. I have only made it a month dry before, but since I have joined DS, I have been like a see-saw. I may not be the best one to give advice, but what I can say is that I am sober when I wake up early, work out, and dress to kill, and tackle my list with a strong mind and god by my side. I have never been involved in AA, yet. I am developing an interest in new hobbies, learning, and trying to learn how to "not sweat the small stuff." Much love to you..

I lost my marriage, children, house, almost my life. I had been in and out of AA few times. I never worked the steps before. I never got a sponsor. I did not need those things. When I did not like AA I went to a substance abuse counselor, did not help me at all. I was mostly my fault for lying to him. I am sure he knew. When to intensive outpatent hospital. expensive!!! Not useful. I finally went back to AA this time committed to he program. Almost 9 months sober!!! Longest stretch in sobriety since I was a teen. AA might not be for everyone, but is for me. And of course, it is all about me :)

Joe, you will always have your children and they will always have you.
In life and death.

I knew I was licked. I couldn't function without alcohol and I couldn't function with it. It was a matter of get help or else. I booked myself into Rehab that day, and went through a 7 week live-in program. Best thing I ever did. Attended AA and had a reality check at my first meeting. I knew I was where I needed to be to get help.
CM xxx

i was out of control.all i wanted was to drink and use.i couldnt face the day straight.i just couldnt stand myself or my life.it was either get help or die.i didnt want to die so i had 2 get help..

Hey sister... I hope you are well...
I was a binge drinker, and didn't think I had a problem... then I wrecked my car and received a DUI. I joined this site, started doing some soul searching, I read BB book and the 12 Steps and started incoportating them in my life... I also had to do some things to change my life. I had to leave my sons father, who I had been with for 6 years, the relationship was unhealthy and I choose to drink to deal with the dysfunction. I was lucky that I did not require rehab or detox... but I was in the "earlier stages" so luckily I was able to change things around with the help of God, and the help of this site.

I had used up all my options. I wanted to die, and this time did not care what happened afterwards. I prayed and was saved-my obssession to escape mentally was relieved. I was given a chance to live life. Now I work everyday to appreciate this wonderful gift.

I tried to quite about 1000 times before this. I had been in rehabs, ER, therapies, really bad situations......don't really know why my bottom came when it did. Wish I could give this gift to you and everyone suffering.

I have a feeling though you are on the right road Ashely.

The key is never give up.

I was in managed drinking as my partner was in recovery. I asked her over and over again what made you an alcoholic. Over the year my drinking escalated gradually. One day we were sitting outside and it just popped out "I wish I could stop drinking".

I don't know where that came from. I never formulated that thought in my head. But that was it. Once I said it...it was out there.

I started going to AA meetings.

A month after I got sober my oldest son told me "you're much more fun now, Mummy. You play games and don't fall asleep all the time." That was a revelation.

The moment you know, you've got to put your all into it. It's never easy, but it's worth everything. I've learned SO much in the last 2.5 years. I've grown so much. And it would NEVER have happened if I was still drinking.