All any of us really have is today, You know yesterdays history and tomorrow's a mystery.I hope to make it through another day sober.I have a sobriety date. It's funny because you made think I'd rather not count the years because their adding up.They have been the best years of my life no doubt about it.

No doubt, indeed, Stephen. I guess my point is "normal" people don't count the days they had their last drink and don't think about their next one. It's just not on their minds. I want to be "normal". Guess I never will be.....

I think it can be a good motivator at times.
like if u are having a bad day you can say well i have gone this long i can go anither day.
in the flip side you can do the same thing and think you are cured.
i guess it all depends on how much you love being sober.

I suppose a big problem might be I don't like being sober all the time. Gawd just shoot me!

I remember it being important to get to that 90 day mark and counted everyday then. I don't count the days anymore. I don't think about drinking daily either. The last time I thought and had a bad craving for a drink was 3 months ago. I called a lady from AA because I had lost all hope for my medical condition and felt like giving up. I dont remember having a craving since then even though everything isnt all hunky dory medically either. I have just come to terms with what I can do and what I cant. I like not having to think about being and alcoholic everyday. If I dont think about a drink why do I have to make sure that I am thinking about it everyday? Dont make sense to me. If it works for some then by all means count. It just isnt something I need to think about everyday to not drink.

Never say never WhooHoo trust your instincts if counting is not for you then don't count. I don't count but I do love living today like it is my last.

Thank you, AliasPanda, for sharing. I hope to be where you are at, cuz I do count. I just don't want to. I'm proud of other peep's days, months, years. I'm jealous, actually. I just want it out of my mind. I don't know if being here is helping or hindering. I find myself getting angry and sad. Triggers.... I don't know. I just wish so many things that aren't coming to pass. Kinda giving up....I hope not.

lol sorry... its helped and hurt me.
this time the only thing that reminds me is my goal thingy here

WooHoo it is not something I planned it just happened. I don't know if I would say jeolous but maybe you envy those who have some good time in sobriety. I think that is normal. As you grow you learn to respect and watch those as and example.

If you are feeling like you are wanting to give up it may be a good time to keep counting those days. I would also suggest you watch the company you keep. You don't have to agree with everything AA stands for but they are sincere at being sober and helping others. A good place to be around those that will not influence you to drink especially now when you are feeling weeker. Even in AA the ones with over a year sobriety go to 2 years and so on into multiples. They all don't keep counting days. I know my sponsor liked to keep a record for herself of each month. She has 17 years of sobriety behind her. I am sure some still count days depending on a craving. I wish you the best. Stay around and get what help you can here.

I always say eat the meat and spit out the bones. lol

Thanks, Alias. You are always an inspiration. I never give up and never will. I just refuse to give up. Sometimes I do get low, low, low....
The serenity prayer is coming to my mind:
The courage to change the things I can.
Gosh I love that.
I love God and I am grateful for all I have and don't have.
I am somewhat grateful for all of you folks here. As irritating as some of yas are....
Can it get any better?
Please tell me, "yes".
Kate

I LOVE to count the years.
When I began, the days and weeks and months were fun too!
I am the only that has patted myself on my back for quitting and if that means I have to do it by counting the years, that's exactly what I'm going to do.

I ave been sober for 1159 days, I count each one as a blessing, and stay grateful as each one passes.

I will never consider myself a non-drinker, I am and always will be an alcoholic, hopefully in recovery.
I think when you start considering yourself just a non-drinker, and forget that you have a disease you are setting yourself up to drink again...

Well, I am an alcoholic and I DO consider myself a non-drinker.
If I didn't, then I'd have to call myself a drinker which I'm NOT!
And...NOT a dry-drunk but a NON-drinker.

Ya know, I always wonder where I fit in with this alcohol world. I am a drinker, Normal no. count sober days, no. Do I look forward to my cocktails... sometimes. I do know the less I focus on it the less I feel controlled. The minute I say "I am not going to have a drink until Sat.", that is the minute I want one. Take one day at a time and do what works for you. It will come. ~lolo

Hey sweetie... I'm not sure if I'm reading you right, or I'm reading too much in between the lines. Please forgive me if I do either. I read in your posts, "I don't like being sober all the time... desire to be normal... can it get better???" Maybe some irritable mood. Are you going threw the "grieving process" sad, you can't be a normal drinker, angry you can't be a normal drinker??? Any ugres to drink? Now I'll be the first one to admit "I'm not versed well on these 12 steps" (just learning...many more people with more knowledge on that) but I think that if your going threw this grieving this is where those 12 steps can help. You asked can it get better? Meaning what the frustration with the drinking issue? Better, not wanting the drink? I'm not sure what "better" means to you. I do believe in these 12 steps and if you work them, yes ALL things will get better...never perfect, but better. Good luck friend, I hope I didn't misread you and if I did feel free to slap me on the wrist. Good night!