Alcoholism Support Group

Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.

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Countdown Logic

PinkArzora
PinkArzora

It is believed, among those who have observed my process, that when I am counting the days invested in my sober streak, I am about to fall. If history is an indicator, that is likely true. I like the drama of the space launch  countdown. Tick off a number. Lets make this shit show exciting.


Truthfully it is not about that. It is a negotiation of sorts. I am making a custody arrangement between my sober and not-sober self. Sober self has been at the wheel for 10 days, 2 weeks, lunar cycle, holiday crossover, et.. Like.. I DESERVE IT FOR BEING SO  GOOD.


Thing is, that's bullshit.


I can always find a reason to drink. 2020 has been a real cornucopia of added reasons to drink, so  it is like triggers are doubling down on your psyche.


Is it a reward to poison myself? Huckleberry Jam cider may be so delicate and awe inspiring to my addict brain. It is a trap. You think you are going to get the yard work done on that follow up sixer? 2020 is the year of the delusion.


I do not want to FACE MY DELUSIONS.


Delusions are there to protect some part of me that can't handle the pain of the truth.


Too much truth  destroys me.


I need slow burn truth, gentle exfoliation of truth.


Anyway. I am a day away from 4 weeks. Does the trap succeed? Will I let my progress drown in bad decisions?


Numbers don't have power. 2020 is a good year to take the power back. 


"I HAVE THE POWER!!" Prince Adam aka He-Man

PinkArzora
PinkArzora
I feel like some "election facts" disclaimer should be right here
Shiney
Shiney
For me personally Pink, I need to count the days, they keep me accountable and on track - I think my orderly brain likes the consecutive numbers and how they keep going up. Each day they go up is a victory for me, the thought of starting those numbers again is horrifying so again, for me, that strategy works. There are no rules, counting or not counting, AA or no AA, Steps or no Steps, whatever works to keep us all individually sober and not to take that first drink, that's all that matters. take care Lisa
1is2many
1is2many
“I deserve it”. That’s the drug calling back to your reward instinct. Very normal

I quit a million times and until I dealt with my inner self and serious mental state I was ready to drink again.

I suggest making some goals and don’t be afraid to succeed ...

C’mon it gets better. I promise

1-2
PinkArzora
PinkArzora
Thank you for your incites. I had a 5 month streak that on the days i would consider maybe a little "cheat day" i would think about resetting to zero. It is a motivator to get time under your belt. I was really proud to reach that number, and like escaping from a killer's lair, want to put as much distance between us as possible.
The sneaky thing with alcohol is how it can disguise itself as something innocuous, like an innocent way to relax. It is a total mind game. I have a disease, it clouds me from the truth of it's real evil. I want to get out of it's house, neighborhood, state, country.. even if i count the steps one by one.
1is2many
1is2many
Don’t get all “in the futured” out. Just make it to sunset , don’t get all resentful and full of envy and hate and remorse. These are the tripping blocks.

Want to bet on if you can make it till next year? That’s doable, but my money is on you. Imagine by January you have made it through the nostalgic holidays with their joys and sorrows. You will be stronger and the next time you will be easier able to pass on the poison.

It is rat poison to me, I will keep drinking and drinking till I die. You can bet on that.

1-2
1is2many
1is2many
I quit for two years once , all it took was a. Christmas party and I said I will have a glass of wine... I daily drank for two more years until I was a pathetic waste of a person. Then I decided I needed help, that was the watershed moment...
1is2many
1is2many
A very powerful drug that will rope me in and kill me and all my dreams with one sip. I find it very helpful to remember but don’t dwell.
Holidays are the downfall to many, I see it every year. Ppl just stop coming to meetings and then show back up in January with dui and divorces. Same problem but it is worse. They are destined to fail until they change their perception.
Shiney
Shiney
1-2, you remind me how important it is to keep the guard up and go day by day. When you wrote about 2 years sobriety, and how that wine led to another 2 years drinking - a good slap in the face for me to never become complacent and do the daily work, thankyou - I am only 5 months so a very timely reminder, those 5 months feel like years, and I am determined to keep going forward and not slip, that's why this group is so important to me - constant reminders and reinforcements of why we want to stay sober and not pick up the first drink.
Shiney
Shiney
And Pink, did your son love the birthday cake you made him ???
1is2many
1is2many
Soon there will be a time when booze just doesn’t want to have anything to do with you,
Shiney
Shiney
Booze looks at me and turns in the other direction :)
PinkArzora
PinkArzora
My son was thrilled with the cake! It was a cookie dough cake with an edible cookie dough garnish & lots of chocolate chip buttercream. Yum-o! I had some for breakfast and important times like mid-morning snack.
Shiney
Shiney
yay, how proud you must have been, and your son will always remember you doing that for him !
1is2many
1is2many
Pink... how ya doin?
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