I studied about the phases of physical recovery in chem. dependency school (I am not a counselor), and here's what they're teaching even the folks in rehab: that your brain builds new synapses all the time, of course, and also new receptor sites for your neurotransmitters, including replacing the ones that looked for fulfillment from the drug of choice.
At various times, the brain goes through a big rebuild, and there are loads of new receptor sites being formed at once, and if you are lucky, they won't be at all tuned into looking for your drug of choice.
But they ARE looking for some good neurotransmitters. At this point, the brain feels the lack of them in your system (these are dopamine, epinephrine, GABA, etc.) so it feels out of balance.
You can consider this discomfort part of the re-building effort, if you choose to look at this state in a positive way. Usually it goes away shortly in a few days if you do exercise, and eat the good foods.

It's something I wish I'd been told about in my first two years of recovery, but they didn't have that kind of science then. So I hope you can use the info to continue on your recovery.

Good reply bambusue.

I wish I knew what to say to help you Anna. But I am at a loss, except to say that keep breathing through it.

Don't stress about being stressed -- it's okay.

Don't drink, and the kinks will work out

i can''t count the many times i share the same feelings.......all too often i broke. no offense, but if you feel like you are going to snap something is going on. i can recite every comment posted to reinforce positive steps. personally i have found that retaining a child's innocent view of life helps me. i am never taken seriously, but it doesn't matter.........let the child live within.

"Don't stress about being stressed -- it's okay" ...oddly enough that helped to hear.

And... thinking about a "child's innocent view".

Bambasue... Maybe so. I think I just struggle without anything to take the edge off. I am 15 sober today. Maybe it is just another lead in to a growth spurt.

I just need to calm down. I think I do panic about anxiety. Can't win that battle for sure.

In any case, not gonna drink. Actually drinking was not much on my mind today - I just wanted the day to end. I had tears in my eyes all day long but couldn't cry. I HATE that. I think I need a meltdown and then I feel like I'm just gonna implode. I don't get it.

I am taking on too much shit and then not able to do any of it. So, I came home from work and forced myself to clean the house and also replaced the faucet in my main bathroom. I was productive and that felt gratifying - the anxiety is still here but I accomplished something.

My sister is coming into town to stay a few days and that puts me on edge for some reason. And other stuff. I'm just exhausted and tired of having no one here to help and it is hard to ask.

Tomorrow will be better.

Please remember and even write down these little things you do during these rough times that helps eleviate it. This is key for you to know, because you need to get an arsenal of stuff ready to combat this.

Glad you are going to the therapist. Don't expect miracles. Be honest.
Tommorow will be better. xoxo

I was just going to ask you if there was someone who could watch the animals for a few days to give you a chance to get away. Then read you last response. It IS hard to ask for help, especially those of us who are used to taking care of others. What is it with us!!!??? Would sis be willing to watch the fort while you take a break? I know what restores my soul is a walk in the woods, amazing how much better I feel mentally after a hike or just some time to myself....for myself.

Remember it is a gift of the spirit to help another....why don't you offer that gift to someone by asking for a little help :D

I have been going through the exact same description for the last 5 days. It came out of know where after 90 days sober.

This is a mental, thinking desease. It is brutal.

I have gone through this before, and been OK.

I believe evrything that "bambuse" says. Our brains heal.

I don't know why this is not discussed in the AA Groups more. This info has kept me from relapsing, just knowing if I can make it to one year, things will be better.

That is a great idea poobear. I thought about taking a couple days off but that thought stressed me out because I have responsibilities at work right now. I even thought about taking a real vacation all by myself but then i thought, I don't trust myself enough yet to not drink if I got weak around it.

i really think that i have been giving myself breaks at the expense of not getting stuff done that i need to get done. I just bit off too much and then other stuff caught up, so I kinda think maybe the best way to get out of it is to get off my ass and force myself to do things like I did today. I also need to grocery shop whether i want to or not and start getting some exercise. i have been watching too much tv procrastinating.

I am trying to ask for help. My sis may be able to help me with a few house things and my bro is supposed to help this weekend to get some yard/chicken stuff done.

i was thinking i need to get in fight mode instead of flight mode. I can do this - I just have to push myself a little through this rough spot. I think this will shift in the next few days or at least by the end of the weekend.

thank you xo

Fight mode-I think I like that.

Tara-- I know exactly what you are talking about in terms of anxiety. i have problemes with anxiety and have to take benzos to sleep. Everything that is stressing you out, wuold stress me out. My therapist has really been helping me with this. Some things I do, is to write it all down, to help dump it out of my head, also having a calendar that includes everything helps, my iphone with all it's organizing tools really helped. let's hope it's still sitting on my desk. I forgot it at work last night and that REALLY stressed me out. Also, write down what you do accomplish in a day.

Now, something else, are you musical, do you like music? Do you dance? I would recommned some music therapy if so. Turn it up, dance,,, sing,,, cry, whereever music takes you. It's like a minivacation and good for you.

Take care.

Thanks. I feel somewhat better today. I think getting some things done yesterday helped.

Amichewa... careful with those benzos. I wish I could take something like that but I found I couldn't control them any better than I could alcohol. I have not taken any pills for anxiety for a few years.

The writing stuff down helps... as long as I can then get myself to knock things off the list. I think I should get a bunch done by Saturday/Sunday.

And I did decide to take a half day off on Thursday.

Tara I so agree with your last post. There is no magic pill to cure the spiritual malady side of alcoholism. I have watched a few of my friends fall apart with "generously" prescribed anti anxiety meds in particular. Its a really really slippery slope.
Anyway, glad you are feeling better. I really find that when I remember to call another alcoholic, especially someone new or newly new, it helps *me* probably more than them! I get caught in the chatter in my own mind often and reaching out, writing a gratitude list, prayer, and exercise all help.

http://www.addictionsandrecovery.org/post-acute-withdrawal.

Found a site that explains what to expect. It's a good thing to use all the tools at your disposal to get through this, and it's worth it, of course.
The best to you.

Thanks again Bambasue. I forgot about PAWS. They did teach us about it in rehab. I didn't realize it would last up to 2 yrs. At 15 mos I thought I'd be past it.

The article explains pretty much exactly what I am going through except that mine will last anywhere from 1 day to several weeks.

I can't believe how exhausting this is. My anxiety is better today but I still feel like I just wanna bawl my eyes out and can't. I can't wait for this day to be over. Ugh.