i knew a guy that had a problem with the God thing. Donny's higher power was his dog. sober about 25yrs when he passed away. i was taught that your Higher Power could b anything u wanted. i had a sponser that started trying to tell me what i "had" to do as opposed to what he suggested i do in my own time, in my own way. that was the end of that sponsership. he helped me a ton but got really controling.

controling behavior and trying to force people to do as they want is the exact opposite of what i read in the big book

Hi, I'm not an AA'er, but I sort of know that spirituality is a huge part of it. I'm using Rational Recovery, which I really feel is sort of using that 'higher power' idea by dividing your brain into the real thinking part (so you can be your higher power) to that limic stem that screams for us to have a drink. Let the part that thinks squash the one that wants to kill us! Also, I saw a movie called the Secret (which was really an infomercial for their books). But if you google the secret by rhonda byrnes (there may be a u in there somewhere), it sort of says the same thing in other words - talks about the laws of attraction, so we shouldn't really be saying 'i don't want a drink', since it has the word 'drink' in it, but rather something like 'i will have a fully conscious beautiful aware day'.
Hope this helps. (ps, don't hate me, but I am a Christian, never would push my God on anyone, and was agnostic for over 20 years, so sorta know where you're coming from - to this day, I cannot, and probably never will be able to deal with the 'over the top' type/hypes)
lr

Yes your sponsor has zero right to tell you what to do, only to suggest things.

Don't let this person have the power to turn you back to drinking. How you go about it doesn't matter -- ignore the jackass (take a break from the site and look at other ones if you have to) and focus on yourself. You don't want some random stranger to be the reason why you go back to drinking for who knows how many years. Hang in!

With all due respect, I imagine that the people who are pm'ing you are probably trying to reach out to you and give you their story of hope and/or recovery. No one can force you to do anything, here or in the real world. It is perhaps your perception of their approach as having a "God complex" and "forcing" themselves on you that has you twisted up.

Not sure if it's the biggest joke on the planet though. I thought that title went to the duckbilled platypus :)

I used the people around the tables as my higher power for the first couple of years. To each their own!

Hey Paul, What's wrong with the duck billed platypus? Gee wlikers, think of all the duck bill platypus mommas trying to comfort their young ones against the sting of such comments.

keepitsimple -- if someone is bothering you, you can ignore them. If you get a PM that you think is out of line, just ignore that as well. There are lots of people here, and even those with the best intentions can sometimes come across the wrong way. Don't let anything or anyone get in the way of your sobriety!

Your higher power should be who or what ever you want it to be. know one has the right to force there opions on you. Im in AA at the moment, i wouldnt dream of pushing my views, or haveing anyone push there views on me. change your sponser. Alchol is difficult to give up as it is. With out all that. Good luck.

So if you don't like someone else's version of recovery, define your own.
No one has jurisdiction over your choices with regard to God, or values, or any of these other personal judgement calls.
Curious as to why its so upsetting to you though?

drcooper......i like your response to the "God thing"......i believe in a higher power and i believe that higher power presents itself in a form individuals can understand.....mine comes with nature. i will drop everything to stand outdoors with an approaching thunderstorm.....the wind,the smell in the air, the trees battling.......then the cleansing.

"what is the use of trying?"......that can only be answered by you.

I think they are just trying to help....everyone is different. I hope you feel better. Hugs, nikki

there's more to it than just people tryin to help. I know for a fact that people get their nuts off on saying shit that sounds cool and getting a round of applause on here.. I'll tell ya how I know that in just a second here, but anyhow, I'm suprised that you're having problems with people doing this in private messages, cuz usually the objective is to get that little release of a miniscule amount of dopamine when someone posts a reply after yours agreeing with ya, particularly after challanging someone on an issue, attacking them, feeling like you're calling them out on their bullshit, etc... everyone loves to look like a recovery superstar and get a round of applause by either making someone look like a little immature punk who just doesn't want recovery bad enough, or correctly reciting AA doctrine word for word from the big book and/or 12&12. How do I know so much about this, you're wondering? Cuz in addition to having seen it enough times, I've been guilty of it myself. It's human nature, which doesn't make it right, but it's important to be aware of it I think, because the understanding of it makes it less offensive, allows us to take it less personally, etc. The desire to be a recovery superstar should never supercede the primary objective of keeping ourselves in recovery and helping others, but unfortunately it can happen. Really, the recovery superstar shit has no usefull purpose and therefore shouldn't be in the picture at all, but...... due to a shortage of robots, members on here are human beings, and the high and mightyness does rear it's ugly head sometimes. The good news however, is that I'm 100% sure that no one on here, recovery superstar or not, devotes a half hour or more every day to this thing soley for the purpose of self exaltation, as there are much more efficient ways of pursuing that goal. I'm sure that the majority of us really do care and want to help, and the high and mightyness just exists sometimes alongside of that. As much as recovering alcys like to think that they've spiritually grown past all that childish shit, we're still just human afterall, I guess... my advice is to just try to control your reaction to any high and mightyness and suppress resentment that could result from it, to make it easier for yourself to see and extract the knowledge and experience that others have to offer. I can't tell ya how much bullshit I've put up with at work over the last few months from older guys who hate newbies, just because I know I have to let really offensive shit roll off of me like it's nothing, for the purpose of absorbing as much of the good that these people have to offer as possible, in the way of teaching me stuff they've learned over 20 or 30 years so I can become better at what I do. I try to stay focues on the big picture, I guess. So far, it's working out well for me, so I just wanted to recommend the same approach to you, for on here or in AA or wherever so you'll have the best shot at long term recovery. Good luck to ya

keepitsimple, no one can force you to do anything just like nobody could force me to drink.

My hope for you is that you find a program of recovery, whatever it is. I know what is feels like to be so angry. I would go into a rage over nothing when I first sobered up. I worked with a sponsor and a psychologist to work through the anger.

Calm down and just breathe.

I don't think you have to believe in God to remain sober. However a belief in something more powerful than self is the concept. It can be nature....more of a spiritual slant, but very powerful. Just because someone is your sponsor doesn't mean you have to follow their path. You're an adult with your own thoughts and feelings. Lighten up and be patient with self. There are a lot of opinions out there....choose one that fits for you. It's all good really.