Alcoholism Support Group

Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.

4,518 Members

34,168 Posts

2 Online

ra1nb0wbright 04/13/2015

ok so my dad is an over the road trucker. He has had an old girlfriend tagging along with him, and she is the biggest drinker I have ever met she drinks everyday from the time she wakes up till she finally goes to sleep. Being around her is what made me justify falling off the wagon April 1st, but has also helped me really get serious about being sober forever. She just showed up about 5 mins ago. Her and my dad are crashing here for the night but outside in his truck) and wanted to talk me to talk with. Her presence makes my heart race and I feel so angry just hearing her breath and smelling her stench.. I dont know how to get over that but just to keep doing what I'm doing and have her stay away from me. I told her that. Am I wrong?

randomgirll 04/13/2015

You are not wrong!

Impermanence 04/13/2015

By facing your problems rather than escaping with alcohol you found solutions. It took courage to get through the fear and tell her.

You did the right thing.

Impermanence 04/13/2015

In the past I did not believe in triggers. I have recently completed a course on the additive brain. The professionals say that the evidence supports triggers. In your case that woman is a trigger for you drinking. You need to avoid her.

As I look back, some AA meetings were triggers for me. I havent relapsed since I stopped going to AA.

Sosa86 04/13/2015

No you are not wrong. Put your sobriety first and always. It's as good as putting your life first and who could blame you for that?!!

ra1nb0wbright 04/14/2015

Thanks for your comments. One of my past issues have been confrontation. Now I will not let anybody put me put me in the wrong situations and I will definitely say why and how I feel. I have to put my feeling before anybody elses when it come to my addiction.

jamesross 04/14/2015

Your not wrong if that's what you want and need, but remember, that also was you. Seeing other drinkers can be a good reminder of what you yourself were like. Maybe not exactly, but if you look closely you will see some of yourself. I really don't like drunks unless I'm drinking with them, and especially if they are buying. But when I'm not drinking, and trying to stay sober I don't have much in common with them, so they can seem very revolting, or abnoxious, but I've been around recovery rooms enough to know that I should try not to judge them. They are sick people that are killing themselves. They are going to die, and I know that they are just trying to find some happiness, but they can't. It's actually pretty sad. Do what you need to do, but don't let it bring you down, and if it does, or is too hard, then cut it off. All the best.

ra1nb0wbright 04/14/2015

And what really makes me angry about her is that I had a talk with her about 2 days before and told her my history with alcohol and that I can't do it nor I want it around me. And she's was at my house doing it. She had replied that this is her and she is not gonna stop for anybody and that she would drink where and whenever she wanted. Once I heard those words come out of her mouth I was in total disgust towards and felt totally disrespected.
I understand that if I put my self in that situation then it's up to me to remove myself. But like I said she was at my house...

ExJerseyGirl2 04/14/2015

She is an alcoholic and nothing you say will get her to stop drinking in front of you. She isn't disrespecting you on purpose, she has to drink. If you have your dad at your house and she is with him, you are going to keep having this problem.

I hope you can keep your distance from her if her actions are triggering you. (Plus I am sure she isn't fun to be around at all anyway.)

Join the Conversation