My personal opinion is that attending meetings regularly is important but I dont really advocate 90 in 90 - it is not an AA thing anyway it came from the justice system. If someone can do 90 in 90 and wants to then fine but it isnt something that is necessary. Quality is more important than quantity in my opinion.

I always tell my sponsees to go to 3 or 4 meetings. At least one has to be one I go to and another one or two should be ones they attend every week then the 4th one where they try different meetings.

Well I don't know for you.

Being so freshly sober, your brain can trick you into thinking your fine.
Thinking it's a competition also is a potential scenario to just give up and fail

I don't know for you...for me I did like 80 in 90 but those first 90 are crucial to have a firm footing to decide

After all...did you drink each da?

Peace

Then try a few more meetings. See for Yourself:)
Billy

thank you all....Nicky that is such a relief to hear!! I can do 3 or 4 a week :) Ill try to stick to the 4...I mean I do enjoy them but some night I just want to relax....I thought everyone was gonna tell me I really needed to do the 90...I am sighing in relief lol....
I really was not an everyday drinker, more of a binge drinker....
But I will make sure that I keep on going on working on getting a sponser..im just not super outgoing and it may take me a little longer than some but I will do it!!!!

Ashley, what's important is having a home group to attend each week and become involved in. I also make sure I attend Step and Big Book meetings (which happen to be at my home group).

Participating is huge! :-)

~Chris

Ash-I know a lot of people say "90 in 90" and that's a personal choice, but it's not meetings that got me sober. It's step work with my sponsor. Learning a new way of life and a new way of dealing with life's ups and downs. I strongly encourage you to find a sponsor and work the steps.

oh and congrats on 30 days comin up girley! That's fantastic! :)

Thanks holy...this will be the first time I have made it this long (with anything at all, used to smoke weed to stop drinking, DIDNT WORK lol) in...cant even remember!!!

When you get the urge to drink it might be too late to go to a meeting. I am in Germany and don't have many meetings around. The first two years I drove to meetings 60 miles from home two times a week. If I did just one meeting I got pretty jumpy after 5 days and wasn't a joy to be around. lol My second year I had been secretary of one group which was good because I had the key and had to keep that comittment.

I don't know. I am at nine months and am doing fine without AA -- not everyone goes to AA meetings.

Do what works for you. I'm not sure why you would feel guilty about the number of meetings you go to.

And congrats on closing in on 30 days!

ASHLEY:

The truth of the matter is that the 90 meetings in 90 days is personable. Some people need it, while others do not.

The question you may wish to ask yourself is "how is my program going"? Are you experiencing any of the promises of A.A.? If not, then perhaps you need to figure out why...

A.A. is a program of "suggestions" not requirements.

"We" suggest regular attendance of meetings for necessary support
"We" suggest having a phone list
"We" suggest having a sponsor (I have 2 -- just in case)
"We" suggest working the steps with your sponsor
"We" suggest getting involved

Remember, "If you want what we have and are willing to GO TO ANY LENGTH to get it, you are ready to take certain steps..." ("How It Works", Big Book, Chapter 5)

Alcoholism is a "thinking" disease, not a drinking disease. You should be extremely wary of what your thoughts are telling you. I strongly suggest going to meetings on a regular basis -- especially when you don't feel like it! I did the 90 in 90 and it was substantial in getting to know what meetings I liked, new people, and most importantly the discipline of going...

Whats going on with you is that alcoholism is trying to kill you! Its your enemy, its trying to convince you that you'll be okay if you don't go to meetings...
Do Not Listen To It!

'am I setting myself up for failure?' The only thing I would say to you is having been here a while I know you have started your journey many times and wouldn't want to see you SLIP (sobriety loses its priority).

In my neck of the woods, 90 in 90 is rehab talk. As Nicky says, it is not a necessity. I think I did about 90 meetings in my first year!

For me, it was the paper on the wall (the steps). It was finding a sponsor who had what I wanted. It was getting connected with a HP of my understanding. And it was being willing to honestly go through the steps and take action. My sponsor was who my HP spoke through (and still does) and I was willing to listen.

To me, the steps are the difference between white knuckling sobriety and between living life.

I would suggest you follow your boyfriends example and get a sponsor. What have you got to lose?

Never saw anything about 90 N' 90 in our Big Book. Do as many meetings as you feel comfortable with. When AA first started out in the 1930's no way could those guys do 90 meetings in 90 days. Weren't too many meetings to go to. But they stayed sober. They stayed sober by doing what they wrote about doing in the early books they published.

Anybody in AA who's actually part of recovery (rather than the disease) doesn't ever want you to feel guilty about anything! Look at the "AA meeting" part of your sobriety as a sanctuary to go to for support. Like mentioned in other posts here, the meeting is just one part of the picture.

I'm my own worst company sometimes. My own thinking won't ever fix my own thinking. I need fresh ideas all the time. When I go to a meeting I share and listen. It clears my head, so it seems. It does me good to see other alcoholics just like me, sober and alive. At our meetings we go around tables and everyone shares. As each person shares they seem relaxed and somewhat happier than before they shared, at least most of them do anyway. I go to lots of meetings just because of that alone.

Hello Ashley,

There are only two times that you should go to meetings - when you feel like going and when you don't.

I was advised to go to 90 in 90 and managed about 80. Today, I would not suggest it to anyone else but for myself, I have to say that I found it both rewarding and enjoyable. The trouble that I had after three months was that I found it hard to cut it back to a more normal level (meetings addiction).

Meetings are an important support mechanism and can also be a social outlet but meetings alone will rarely be enough. As others have stated, the most important thing is to get a sponsor and start doing the programme. You can go to two meetings a day and listen to people's drinking stories but where will that get you?

My first statement above was spoken in jest but at the same time there may be something there worth thinking about. It is easy to fall into the trap of thinking that all is well now, so I don't need to do anymore. For an alcoholic, that can be dangerous thinking.

My suggestion is to go to a few meeting a week, ones that you like going to. Listen to people sharing and don't stress too much. After a while you will hear a few people who seem to know about the steps and who have a certain calmness and peace about them. Ask one of those ladies if she would be your sponsor. She does not have to have years of sobriety and you don't even have to have much in common, as long as she knows and lives by the programme.

G'Day Ashley.

Why they say 90 meetings in 90 days is hopefully by taking the body to as many meetings as you can in the beginning eventually the head will come along to.

I was doing a meeting a day because I was able to.then on some days I would do two meetings and on weekends occasionally 3 meetings a day for the first couple of years.

Was i being selfish, probably I was married with 4 young children maybe i should have been spending more time with them. But the thing for me was i wasn't drinking.Even though things at home were like world war 3.

And I was told anything I put before my recovery I could lose. So being selfish and putting my recovery before my wife and family was not an option for me.Because if I picked up a drink I would lose them all anyway. I had no doubts about that.Sobriety had to be my number one priority.

In hindsight I grateful I done the meetings in the beginning and built my recovery on a solid foundation because I just celebrated 20 years of unbroken sobriety and I am in my dreams awake.

My wife, children and now grandchildren are all still apart of my life and love me and I love them and I am able to show it. World war 3 ended for us many years ago although there are a few small battles here and there but that's life ^^^^^^^^^^^^.

If you have things to do in your day or evening and can't make a meeting don't worry about it but if your head starts to make excuses for not going and tells you, you can get to one tomorrow then get to one I am sure you will be glad you did.

People who don't go to AA meetings won't understand what a meeting can do to change the trust of your thinking that's okay.

Well that's enough from me .

Congratulations on 30 days keep it up ADAAT.

God Bless...

LIonel