The key to the 8th step (and every other step) is GOYA! Get off your ass.

IMHO, it is fear that prevents us from moving forward through the steps. Ask your HP to remove the fear and to guide you. HP does for us what we can't do for ourselves.

Good luck

In my experience the 8th Step list comes straight from the people and institutions you named in your Step 4 inventory. It's only character defects still at play that can hamper Step 8, if that is the case a repeat of Steps 6 and 7 would be a good idea on the particular character defects that are at play.

In Step 8 I had to consider whether I could forgive those people on the list who had wronged me as well... it was pointless to go through the amends process if I was to seek forgiveness from those I was not prepared to forgive for what they did to me!

Just my experience.
With good sponsorship it was very easy for me, I remember it pretty vividly.
It came directly from step 4. My sponsor dissected it and made his markings, they were broken down in a red marker; LA, DA, and i don't remember his other markings. LA was his biggy that I come to find out was living amends. This meant I had to live right and keep my side of the street clean. I had to go to the animal shelter and volunteer, mow vacant lawns, clean parking lots, and so on. I know this sounds extreme, but when you want to change your life, it really isn't after all the damage i did.
My direct amends(step 9) shrunk immensely. It's not all about running around apologizing to everybody. Years later i still run up on somebody that wasnt even on my list , and I always apologize for being such a drunken idiot.
Honestly step 8 took no longer than 1.5 hour.
I have to refer back to my sponsor which guided all my actions to proceed with step 9. Yes, he was and still is an extreme step nazi, that is one of a kind.

Always found it's the 'became willing' part of this step that takes a long time rather than the 'made a list' part.

Are you seriously saying you never hurt or harmed anybody? Seriously??

Write down people you've hurt. Yes #2, start with the names on your 4th step. Start becoming willing to go to just one of these people.

The 8th Step list is not only derived from the 4th Step but from me listing other harms against people, even if there was no resentment attached.

Doesn't seem that you were thorough in Step 4 through 7 if you're still only thinking of what people did to you.

You may need to back up IMO. Good luck.

When anything feels overwhelming - doing one thing at a time usually gets the ball rolling.

Maybe you could start by writing one sentence at a time - if that stretches out to more - good. If not - you can do the nest sentence tomorrow.

Step 8: "Make a list of all people you have harmed and become willing to make amends to them."

It took me a long time to actually realize that I had harmed people - I was so into being a victim.

We usually hurt people because we resent them in some capacity - and we rationalize what we do because they had hurt us first. Take a look at what you have done to other people you resented - take the resentment out of the equation - and just look at your actions and see if you caused any harm.

Start there. I know I have a huge amends to make to someone very close to me - I acted out of major resentment - and I did something I regret terribly. Pride and resentment go together - and they make us act in a way that can be very detrimental to another.

So maybe you could start simply - and see who you hurt - even if you "deserved" to hurt them - write them on your list. Ultimately this is a very empowering step - because it allows us to come out of victimhood.

And thank you for the post, by the way, Anne.

This reminded me of the amend that I need to make.

Talk to your sponsor. Tell her you are stuck.
If you did a thorough 4th step, you should be able to use that list to put together your 8th.
It shouldnt stick you up. All you need to do is make a list and be *willing* to make amends to them all. It doesnt say you have to do it. Just be willing.
9th step is the actual making of the amends. So why are you stuck on 8?

I could give you information on how I did my 8th step and how I take my sponsees through it but I suspect it wouldn't help as the problem is like to be something other than a practical one.

If at step 8 you were still focused on what other people did to you it sounds like there is a problem with earlier steps. I also find that delay in step 8 is often about fear and avoidance of step 9 which also indicates a problem in the earlier steps.

Step 8 is practically very simple who do I owe amends to, am I clear on what I am making amends for, how should I make those amends. Then willingness. I have found that willingness is a process. By starting making the amends I was willing to do I gradually became willing to make the ones I was initially hesitant about.

I would suggest you talk to your sponsor. Sounds like there could be a problem either with knowing what you are trying to achieve in step 8 or with earlier steps.

Oh my! Thanks for all the thoughts and experience! Just to be clear, I looked at my first run of the 8th step, and read the instructions I had written from my sponsor. I looked at the list and re-did half. With the harms I had done to others. I am half through, but can't get through the rest of it.

I know I caused a lot of hurt, mis trust, anger, shame, the list goes on. It's not a short list. I screwed a ton of people over with my words, actions and ways.

I guess I just need to get off my ass and do it. I like the "one sentence at a time" idea. Or one person a time. Ugh. Frustrating!!!

Sometimes it helps my sponsees to schedule a set time to come to my house, sit at the table and spend the time they need doing the list making. I offer this particularly for step 4 and 8.

For others we actually sit and work through the step 8 list together. They do the hard work but I can guide them and hopefully make it easier.

Maybe you could talk to your sponsor and see if she can help you.

Willingness. Once I got past that part, the writing was just an exercise. It's just a list, nothing more. I put to paper those I caused harm to. I went over it with my sponsor, and talked about each one - some we realized I didn't need to make the amend, or to do so would have injured them or someone else. Others (very few) were living amends (which I don't like the term much, as I find it's a cop out for many, but that's a post on it's own!). But certainly I had direct amends from that list.

I wrote mine on the subway coming to work over a day or two. If I waited for the "right time" and the "right mindset"...I would still be on that step.

You can talk to your sponsor about what it is that is blocking you from doing this. But it really comes down to just sitting and getting it done. No other way of doing it. :)