Alcoholism Support Group
Alcoholism is the continued consumption of alcoholic beverages, even when it is negatively affecting your health, work, relationships and life. If you think alcohol is causing you to lose control, it's time to seek help. Our group is a safe place to vent, check in, get back up if you fall, and reach sobriety.
I'm not currently intent on giving up drinking. I've been taking a closer look at why I drink and how it effects me and wanted to share it somewhere so here I go.....
A number of years ago I became very ill and was in a sense, "saved" by an alternative practitioner. Through the years I've gone back including a recent visit. As part of her expertise, I went through a detox session (note, not an ALCOHOL detox - but toxin stuff). Here prescription for me is to eat certain foods, take certain supplements and have no more than one glass of red wine a day and only one cup of coffee.
So lets take about what my thought patterns look like, Hmmm, coffee? Yes, that first cup is good but I always want, crave, need two more. Wine? One glass? It's like eating 10 cashews. Ten potato chips? Yeah, right.
So back to how it effects me. I was reading a book in the easy chair and had a glass of wine before dinner and then 1.5 after dinner. Trust me, I'm no teetoteler (sp?). What my thought pattern says is something like..."I'm hear in the easy chair relaxing reading a book and this wine is further relaxing me". Ok, I go to bed at 10:30 and proceed to wake up at 2, 3pm. I get up this morning and clearly do not feel rested. Why do I share all this? Damn, it's toxic. I guess moderation is a relative term.
In reading this other book I've been reflecting on what I believe about alcohol....
There are the event beliefs....
1) Baseball, hotdog and beer go together
2) A meal at a great steak restaurant requires a nice full bodied red
3) Mexican food goes best with a Texas marguarita
4) Beer in a can should be brought to the hot tub....
Then there are the emotional beliefs.....
1) Damn, I'm pissed off. Let me have some drinks
2) Yeah, they are getting married, let's open some champagne!
3) Today was an awesome day, a bottle of white would be great
I can't say I obsess about alcohol, but I see it as pretty darn insidious. I did attend some AA meetings over the past 4-5 months. I found that people are REALLY nice but the total abstinence route just didn't seem to fit me. i'll add that at a "beginners" meeting folks would go around the table and share when they had their last drink. I'd say, "Um, two days ago" while some people said "1982!". Am I physically addicted to alcohol? - I think not. I will say that as I look at the emotional beliefs, although maybe not addictive, I'm not entirely happy to own or have them and would like to work on "reprogramming" my beliefs. I mean, imagine if I replace all the alcohol references with a cigarette?
I get that it's different in a sense -- I mean cigarettes have really changed where they sit in society since the 50's.
Ok, so I'm carrying on here a bit. Sorry - maybe this have just been a journal entry for me.
A number of years ago I became very ill and was in a sense, "saved" by an alternative practitioner. Through the years I've gone back including a recent visit. As part of her expertise, I went through a detox session (note, not an ALCOHOL detox - but toxin stuff). Here prescription for me is to eat certain foods, take certain supplements and have no more than one glass of red wine a day and only one cup of coffee.
So lets take about what my thought patterns look like, Hmmm, coffee? Yes, that first cup is good but I always want, crave, need two more. Wine? One glass? It's like eating 10 cashews. Ten potato chips? Yeah, right.
So back to how it effects me. I was reading a book in the easy chair and had a glass of wine before dinner and then 1.5 after dinner. Trust me, I'm no teetoteler (sp?). What my thought pattern says is something like..."I'm hear in the easy chair relaxing reading a book and this wine is further relaxing me". Ok, I go to bed at 10:30 and proceed to wake up at 2, 3pm. I get up this morning and clearly do not feel rested. Why do I share all this? Damn, it's toxic. I guess moderation is a relative term.
In reading this other book I've been reflecting on what I believe about alcohol....
There are the event beliefs....
1) Baseball, hotdog and beer go together
2) A meal at a great steak restaurant requires a nice full bodied red
3) Mexican food goes best with a Texas marguarita
4) Beer in a can should be brought to the hot tub....
Then there are the emotional beliefs.....
1) Damn, I'm pissed off. Let me have some drinks
2) Yeah, they are getting married, let's open some champagne!
3) Today was an awesome day, a bottle of white would be great
I can't say I obsess about alcohol, but I see it as pretty darn insidious. I did attend some AA meetings over the past 4-5 months. I found that people are REALLY nice but the total abstinence route just didn't seem to fit me. i'll add that at a "beginners" meeting folks would go around the table and share when they had their last drink. I'd say, "Um, two days ago" while some people said "1982!". Am I physically addicted to alcohol? - I think not. I will say that as I look at the emotional beliefs, although maybe not addictive, I'm not entirely happy to own or have them and would like to work on "reprogramming" my beliefs. I mean, imagine if I replace all the alcohol references with a cigarette?
I get that it's different in a sense -- I mean cigarettes have really changed where they sit in society since the 50's.
Ok, so I'm carrying on here a bit. Sorry - maybe this have just been a journal entry for me.
Nice post and I agree with many of the comments. In particular, my guess is it's not just about 2.5 drinks. It's like when you go to the doctor and he asks about alcohol consumption..if you say 2 drinks a night, he or she thinks 4.
I like the comment before this one about changing your habits when you know you are likely to get cranked up on the drinking front. For example, if you are pissed off - call a friend, go somewhere and punch something (safely of course) or get some exercise. As with any "habit", breaking the pattern is key. I have some friends who are recovering alcoholics and a good friend who is open to discussion alcohol consumption. Maybe you can find someone like that to talk to.
You may be a normal drinker, but only you know that. I thought I was and finally decided not only was I not a normal drinker, but that I am fine and feel better not drinking. Plus, one drink and I am off to the races and that is not a pretty picture.
I still think alcohol is dangerous to me.I still get many awful hangovers.The compulsion is still there not as much but it is.I deal with stress with alcohol.You?
I like your comments and I'm musing.
btw Karmic I didn't undersand your first sentence :)
Please read Chapter 3 of the Big Book of AA. That chapter talks about the various ways we try to think our way out of having a drinking problem. It was the most important chapter for me because I had been just as busy as you are trying to convince myself that I did not have a problem.
Throughout your post you make it clear you have paid a lot of attention to your your thoughts about alcohol. They appear to be many of the same thoughts most of us have had about alcohol.
You can try to figure out what is causing your drinking until the cows come home. But the truth is - if you drink to excess and cannot control it - you are probably an alcoholic. If not - you are probably just a drinker. How you view your drinking e.g. what it signals to you, is not going to make much difference in the long run.
I was reading through it and realized that the difference between us is that I would not have bought a bottle of wine, I would have bought a box of wine, and history has shown that I would NOT have stopped at 2.5 glasses. In fact, what I always did was use this giant to-go coffee mug I have that in itself holds the equivalent of about 2.5 glasses and would consume it in about the same amount of time most people would drink a regular 5-oz glass of wine. It's a really good quality thermal mug, so I could put the lid on it and no one could tell there was wine in there instead of coffee, so that cup was with me at home, at school, even at church. A 15-litre box of wine would last me about a day and a half.
I don't think there's a thing in the world wrong with having a nightly glass of wine to relax in the evening, or a margarita with your fajitas, or a glass of champagne at a wedding -- if you aren't an alcoholic. I am an alcoholic, and I know that, for me, it's poison.
I guess that what I'm trying to say is that your beliefs that you listed aren't necessarily indicators that you're an alcoholic. Most adults I know who aren't teetotalers have those feelings and beliefs. If you find that just about every moment of every day is a good excuse to drink, or if you find you can't abstain or slow down if you want to, then you should seriously consider your situation and whether or not you're a problem drinker.
I'm in the process of reading the AA Big Book, and was surprised to read that some alcoholics aren't even necessarily continuous drinkers. If they continuously obsess about it, then they are considered alcoholic, too. So just evaluate your thoughts, and good luck!
It's also that way with some other things for me that aren't the best - for example, yesterday I open up the big bag of potato chips and could have simply put it on like a horses feed bag.