It's me again..just when I thought things were getting better and I could talk to people a little "it" happened and I am down the pit again.."IT" is the realisation that this shouldn't be so hard and you shouldn't be struggling with this and there are so many more bigger problems in life and the desperate wish that you had someone..anyone to talk to in person and not just over the phone...Uhhhh..I am sooooo lonely..why does it have to be so damn difficult to make friends???
If someone doesn’t respond to my message right away or something I fear that they hate me even when I haven’t waited very long at all. I’m always living in fear of offending someone or saying/doing something wrong and I analyze everything I say to check if I’ve said anything wrong and if I perceive that I did I dwell on it to the point of practically making myself sick.
It isnt big pharma. After 10+ of PTSD anxiety/panic disorder with agoraphobia I finally feel free. My mind is calmer, I actually want to do things and I dont have anticipitory anxiety about everything anymore. I have been helping fellow vets as well as others i have met in local support groups.