I agree with you. Coincidentally, I recently decided to to refer to "cloth/disposable underwear". It is only a hygiene & social need resulting from a medical problem. Nothing at all to do with being a baby or infant.

Beth, I agree completely! I tend to just use the word "protection" and leave it at that.

This is always a issue with no perfect answer. At the end of the day a diaper is a diaper just as shoes are shoes and spoons are spoons. No one dislikes calling forks "forks" just because babies have special ones. I no longer eat with a teddy bear spoon and I no longer wear a baby diaper. What I eat with is adult cutlery and what I keep dry with is an adult diaper.

The problem is not ours, but with those who choose to deny us respect by insisting that every adult diaper user must be extremely immature or intentionally weak.

Hi guys, thanks for the comments. I understand that a nappy/diaper is what it is but ultimately it is an incontinence pad. I just think that alot of people out there would prefer to refer to them as a nappy . I can also understand this but the issue i wanted to make was why does daily strength refer to them as this. It seems that there are more people out there who can control there incontinence with a pad etc and not everyone wears a nappy/diaper.

Thanks - I hadn't fully appreciated that the OP was about pads - I have used these but in my simple male way had thought they fitted into thegeneric term "nappy" (or diaper). I now know better.

Yeah i agree a pad is a pad. And diaper is a diaper lol. Quite a difference.

Internally (myself, close family, my GF certainly) I use more precise terms since I use variously "Pads" "Diapers" and "Absorbent Underwear" depending on circumstance and severity of my incontinence at that time.

Externally (everyone else) I refer to it all as protection

I prefer people call them diapers since that is what they are. In time it wouldn't seem so unusual if people knew some folks wore diapers.

I guess I'm in the same boat with people that just call them diapers. I believe words do have a great deal of power so in that vein, if we feel we can't use the word diaper because it's too shameful or embarrassing, we're inadvertently accepting the shame and embarrassment of our condition. That being said, I'd be lying through my teeth if I claimed don't feel shame and embarrassment at times like when leaks or accidents happen or when having to show/tell a new doctor about my condition. But I've asked myself why accept any more shame than already comes with this condition by giving the word "diaper" any more power than society already gives it. When I talk about my condition with my friends who know about it or with my regular doctor(s), I use the word diaper like it's no big deal. I feel like if I treat the word diaper like it's taboo, I'm communicating to others that it is taboo. I really do want to validate the original poster's point that the word diaper DOES have power because our society gives it such power. And I appreciate that the original poster started a very good thread for conversation. I also will choose to respect anyone if they prefer to avoid using the word diaper (or nappy) just because I make a different choice. I know I'm not a baby or a toddler because I wear a diaper and I know I'm not some horribly flawed person... I just refuse to give any of my power away by being extra ashamed of something I would control if I could and I don't want to have to hide from a word on top of that, too.

I should have mentioned that I meant to acknowledge also the original poster's point that "diaper/nappy" might represent overkill for people that don't need that level of protection. Very fair point, indeed.

waterproofing - padding

Beth, you make an interesting point, but not the one I think your intending. Because you don't require "diapers", you seem offended by the use of that word applied to you. You're helping feed the sigma, by acting like the words nappy and diaper are something to be ashamed of.

I'm in the camp that those words aren't so bad. When I stared wetting the bed again regularly, I started wearing diapers. For about a year, my wife would use the word. she always referred to them as, "my things". It actually hurt my feelings. it felt like she was embarrassed of me, or like it was this repugnant, unspeakable thing. I'm actually happy she calls them diapers now.

My wife calls them my 'protection'. She's concerned and aware about me wetting the bed and also my recliner, so she will often ask if I have my 'protection' on late at night. She came up with the word and I'm fine with it. Since only her and I know about my condition and she won't push any stigma on me even if I were to say I have my night diaper on, just calling it my protection is what we decided on.