Adoption Support Group
Adoption is the legal act of permanently placing a child with a parent or parents other than the birth parents. Whether you are looking to adopt, putting your child up for adoption, parenting an adopted child, or just thinking about it, this is the place to discuss.
I am new to this group. My DH and I have been really TTC since May 2008 but we have never used protection/contraceptive since we were married December 2006. We were diagnosed with IF in December 2008 due to male factor and I have endometriosis/PCOS. We have had 2 failed IUIs with donar sperm and are currently taking a break.
I found out this week that my brother and his girlfriend are about 6 wks pregnant. (both are under age). My brother and his girlfriend would like to sit down with DH and I to discuss what it would be like if we were to adopt their baby.
I NEED ADVICE!!! How involved should they be in the babies life if we do, how do baby showers work, how will doctors appts and delivery work, ect?
I found out this week that my brother and his girlfriend are about 6 wks pregnant. (both are under age). My brother and his girlfriend would like to sit down with DH and I to discuss what it would be like if we were to adopt their baby.
I NEED ADVICE!!! How involved should they be in the babies life if we do, how do baby showers work, how will doctors appts and delivery work, ect?
deleted_user
My advice is that you need to be really honest with yourselves here. Remember, this is your brother..a close relative, and be he underaged or not, you will still see him at family gatherings, etc.. So, I guess I would ask how involved to you want them to be in baby"s life? If you say "not at all" or maybe a little" then I guess I would caution against this. If you want to have a true open adoption, where baby knows all, then you will be ok.. It is so hard, as you are wanting a baby so much, yet this may not be the ideal situation.. It is heart vs head here... I wish you luck, but in closing, I say...please be totally honest with yourself, as this will impact the lives of 5 people...
AmberKay3
Thanks for your advice. My plan is to have an open adoption with the baby knowing it us as its mom and dad but that it grew in the aunts belly for us. Just praying a lot!
deleted_user
Sounds like you have a good plan.. I so hope it all works out for you! Please keep us posted!
AmberKay3
I will and thank you for your support!
zoey200823
I was adopted and i knew from the start. as for open i recommened it depending on the situation. just be carefull because the birth mother is able to change her mind for a ceratin period of time. make sure in your heart this is right for your family and their family. and I'll be here to answer any questions you have from the adoptee point of view.
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