Adoption Support Group
Adoption is the legal act of permanently placing a child with a parent or parents other than the birth parents. Whether you are looking to adopt, putting your child up for adoption, parenting an adopted child, or just thinking about it, this is the place to discuss.
my name is kelly, 19 years ago i gave my son up for adoption. i was only 14 wen i had him. i chose a great couple to raise him, and they have done a fantastic job. christopher is his name. i recvd over christmas a family letter detailing the years good and bad. on the back, dave his father wrote chris' heart needs to be soften before he chooses to meet me. i am so looking forward to that time, its just not coming fast enough any thoughts! xo, kelly
deleted_user
Hi! First as an adoptive parent I want to say thank you for your tremendous act of love for your child by giving him up for adoption. It is my belief there is no greater love a mother can show her child. As far as seeing him I am a little surprised by Dave's words. It sounds like they tried to keep it a secret from him and when he found out was mad etc. A child reacts to thing sbased on how they are presented and if he had been aware of your existence and the circumstances surrounding the adoption I don't see how he would need to be softened before he chooses to meet you. Perhaps it is the changing of the times but I was also adopted and found out as teenager that I was and still didn't need to be softened to meet my dad. Our agency requires annual or bi-annual letter and pictures from birth to age 21 so our birthmother will know everything about our little miracle to come. I hope and pray that you get to meet your son one day. I would offer one piece of advice when that day finally comes just get to know him. Don't worry about the past just let him know how excited you are to meet him and have a relationship with the man he is today. Good Luck. XO :)
cali36
wow. This is a difficult situation. I will one day be in your shoes too. Have you asked them why his heart needs to be soften? What was he told? Maybe a letter to him may help?
deleted_user
I am trying to figure out exactly what he ment by saying that to you! I was adopted by wonderful parents and I can tell you the day I told my adotive mom I was going to meet my birthmom, my adoptive mom was uneasy about it, not that she was a threat but just if I was going to be wlecomed are not. When God is ready for you two to meet it will happen, you are on his time not yours. I rember I had all this info for two years and couldn't make contact, but when I did it happened a little too fast I think. I made the call on a Thursday afternoon and I was meeting everyone Saturaday afternoon it went by so fast it floorboarded me. And I just thought I was ready for all that but really I wasn't. But like I said when Gods ready for it to happen just be prepared for the biggest day of your life, and hold nothing back tell him exactly how you feel don't hold anything back, but don't scare him either rember you are a stranger to him. God bless you with your reuionion.
Join the Conversation