ADHD / ADD Support Group
Attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and attention deficit disorder (ADD) are more common than you might think. It is a syndrome that exhibits symptoms such as hyperactivity, forgetfulness, mood shifts, poor impulse control, and distractibility. Join others who suffer from these conditions and share your experiences.
My son was signed up with a perfect teacher this year (3rd grade), but they switched him the first day of school to a strict woman who lectured him about staying focused and completing his work in class before the first bell had even rung, and I didn't even tell her about the ADHD. I know that when my son stresses out he gets more scattered, so I can only expect him to have major struggles with her. The teacher asked me if my son were a self-starter that did his work without assistance and I said not typically. The teacher then said that the class might not be the right fit for him. This was all said in front of him which makes me worry about his self esteem. My husband wants me to talk to the principal about it, and I will, but I would appreciate any ideas about how to articulate the solution. I would like to see my son sent back to his original class and have them send some other kid to this drill sargent., someone who doesn't have the challenges my son has, but I don't know how to say it with diplomacy. What;s more, his new teacher got teacher of the year last year so they probably won't be open to much criticism. I'll tell you though, I was intimidated by her and she's over a foot smaller than I am! I can't imagine how my little guy is feeling. Anyway, thanks for listening. Tell me what you would do. We're new at this school, so we don't have seniority. Sigh.
She would say things to him like "What is wrong with you?"
I tried to teach him to say "nothing is wrong with me. moving around helps blood flow to my brain."
He was way too scared to say that to her, understandably.
I went to the principal, which I quickly found out was not the right way to go about it. I should have talked to her first. She ended up calling me at home and I managed to have a good conversation with her. She changed her ways immediately and my son managed to settle in relatively well.
Nobody will advocate for your son but you. I would suggest talking to her first. I always thought strict teachers were not good for my son because they weren't good for me. It turns out that after settling in with strict teachers (he always hated them at first), he ended up doing much better and having more confidence in the long run.
My favorite teachers are the ones that manage to inspire him - but they are very rare.
I think you are right they won't be open to criticism, so maybe approaching it as you are getting and giving information would better help him. Good luck and stay involved!
That said, as someone who had ADD, I do have mixed feelings about the strict versus nice.
Organizational skills are among the most important and many teachers just let children pass, and pick up the paycheck. ADD people can do it, they just have to work harder. Getting someone who will stay on top of kids can be good. The question may not be who makes the child feel best about himself, but who can successfully impart skills that will be with him for his entire life.
That said, I would try to choose the teacher who you believe would be best.