Cliff, thank you, I'm an FLT3er and NPM1 er, so when I was first given that info, I went on the internet and became one big obsessive depressed mess. Then I calmed down, my oncologist helped me to regain my faith with encouragement, and then I found you all. Today, Sunday, I am doing well post induction, my first bone marrow check was great, and I am going to be doing some meditation in honor of Eddie's big day. A bit of yoga, and work out with some arm bands, and enjoy a visit from my daughter in town. Blessed!

For all the new members to this loving, supportive, informed and tenacious group, I am bumping this article about cancer statistics up for your reading enjoyment. I am a relative newbe to this group but I can truly say a gain strength every day from each of you. I found Dave Brown (God led me to Dave Brown) via a very indirect path and subsequently to this site. I praise God daily for blessing me with hope for the future. You are all part of that hope!

Blessings,

Julie

For all the new members and those like myself who need a reminder, I'm bumping this article to the top. I read it often because it reminds me to stay away from the net and to rely on My God to sustain me through this battle. I AM NOT a statistic- I AM A SURVIVOR and an OVERCOMER thru Christ Jesus! I hope this article blesses you.

Julie

Thanks Julie -- GREAT move -- it really needs to be seen especially by our new comers. Take care -- dave

Julie, thank you for sharing this article. Although the swords of battle may be numerous, faith and trust in the Lord is the sharpest among them. He truly sustains. I do also agree in the benefit of finding humor in the most dire of situations. The Bible says "A merry heart is like good medicine". During my stays at University of Chicago, I went out of my way to find ways of pulling playful pranks on my nurses. Not only was it beneficial for me, but for the oncology nurses who deal with incredible sadness on a daily basis. While at U of C, I came across patients with a variety of different attitudes, and those who were positive seemed to do much better than the others.

Kim,

I so agree with your perspective regarding our faith in God. When I was first diagnosed, I wondered if I had failed as a Mother to my daughters (then 8,10 and 12) and God was protecting them from my influence. So amazing the thoughts Satan can use to weaken us at our lowest points.

I would not wish AML on my worst enemy; however, there are so many positives that have occurred in my family's life as a result. Although a Christian when diagnosed, my faith has grown exponentially over the past year. My priorities have changed and I live so much more in the moment now.

I did not suffer through many complications during my consolidation others have encountered especially those who have had a BMT like yourself. I was sequestered for 10 months due to slow count recovery. My daughters were on lock down with me especially during last summer. We spent hours walking, talking and reading the Bible together. One day my eight year old suggested we name ALL the blessings that have come from my cancer. I was overwhelmed by emotion and pride. Each girl had several blessings from the experience and none of them had to do with a new IPhone, InstaGram or any of the other things most tweener girls focus on.

This trial happened to the Pasco family for a reason and we will prevail. My daily hearts cry to my God is to allow me to raise my girls knowing that His will may be different. All I can do is put my complete trust in Him. I strive everyday to do so. Your perspective and experience is an inspiration to me and I am so glad you are here!

Blessings,

Julie

Julie,
My heart hurt as I read your opening words. One of the greatest burdens as a mother is to fear that you have somehow failed your kids. It is true that Satan uses whatever he can to put doubt and fear in our hearts, with the ultimate goal of pulling us away from God. Satan's ways are subtle, and he does not like to be found out. I am so glad that you recognized the attack for what it was.

I wholeheartedly agree with you that good can come out of (even) AML. It's one of the best-kept secrets. The Bible says that "all things work for good for those that love the Lord, and are called according to His purpose." Like you, I have also grown in my faith (and in my trust) in the Lord. I finally understand that I don't need the answers to everything--and in many cases, I may not even want to know. There is a great sense of peace in that.

Your family sounds absolutely precious, Julie! I can tell your daughters were impacted greatly by everything you've gone through, and I'm SO glad you are doing well! It sounds like they have a deep appreciation for that which matters most. God bless you and your family. :)

~~Kim

This was great! And so well written. Thanks for sharing!!