I tend to think that celibacy is more of a vow that revolves around spirituality or religion. Abstinence is a lifestyle choice and not necessarily one of permanence.

m00n,

Abstinence refers to refraining from sex with others and yourself.

Celibacy refers to having sex with others only.

Those are the basic definitions.

If you have not had sex with others but were sexual with yourself, then you have only been celibate.

Wolf

This distinction between the two makes sense to me (Wiki):

Abstinence and celibacy

The words abstinence and celibacy are often used interchangeably, but are different. Sexual abstinence, also known as continence, refers to abstaining from all sexual activity, often for some limited period of time. Asexuality is considered distinct from abstention from sexual activity and from celibacy, which are behavioral and generally motivated by factors such as an individual's personal or religious beliefs.

In her book The New Celibacy, Gabrielle Brown states that "abstinence is a response on the outside to what's going on, and celibacy is a response from the inside." According to this definition, celibacy (even short-term celibacy that is pursued for non-religious reasons) is much more than not having sex. It is more intentional than abstinence, and its goal is personal growth and empowerment. This perspective on celibacy is echoed by several authors, including Elizabeth Abbott, Wendy Keller, and Wendy Shalit".

I realize that there are different definitions ... thanks for your answers.

abstinence does not just refer to sex!!!!!!!!! but The act or practice of refraining from indulging an appetite or desire, especially for alcoholic drink or sexual intercourse.
Synonyms: abstinence, self-denial, temperance, sobriety, continence
These nouns refer to restraint of one's appetites or desires. Abstinence implies the willful avoidance of pleasures, especially of food and drink, thought to be harmful or self-indulgent: "I vainly reminded him of his protracted abstinence from food"
Self-denial suggests resisting one's own desires for the achievement of a higher goal: I practiced self-denial to provide for my family's needs.
Temperance refers to moderation and self-restraint and sobriety to gravity in bearing, manner, or treatment; both nouns denote moderation in or abstinence from the consumption of alcoholic liquor: Teetotalers preach temperance for everyone. "those moments which would come between the subsidence of actual sobriety and the commencement of intoxication" (Anthony Trollope).
Continence specifically refers to abstention from sexual activity: The nun took a vow of continence. and celibacy is
1. Abstinence from sexual intercourse, especially by reason of religious vows.
2. The condition of being unmarried.

By that line of reasoning...

"Abstinent" = to abstain from something.

I abstain from drinking coffee or eating meat, gummi bears, and twinkies = I am therefore abstinent. This is correct, so...

CONTEXT is everything.

Ha! Not to add to confusion (if there is any) but for some reason, my distinction draws from childhood, where there was this notion that "religious people (nuns and priests) are celibate" and "the rest of the people " are abstinent. In my mind, I translated that into virginity vs. non-virginity. In other words, I thought that a person could not technical be celibate from sex but considered only to be abstaining if they were previously sexual. Ha ha, I always tell my kids to "look it up!" I guess this would serve me as well!! Thanks for the clarity all!!

For the record, I have not had sex since Feb. 2011. It started out by choice but is not the case recently...am I celibate or abstinent? Another word comes to mind...

You're abstinent.

I haven't eaten steak or any other meat in at least 12 years. I'm abstaining = abstinent (from that too).

I have not had sex in 4 years...

@musicalmom,

I'm new here, and I should be sporting that understated ellipsis you have too: I haven't had sex in 5 years, and I'm only in my mid-20s! No bueno! This is mostly circumstancial -- being too busy battling & luckily defeating mental illness. Only recently was I presented an opportunity for intercourse, last June with one of my community college classmates. It fell apart very quickly with her, though, and I turned her down despite having a quick, sensual start.

So ya. Ur elipsis is understood very much here...It's rough indeed, and I didn't have a name for what I've been going through until I came across this support group just last week. For me at least, going at it with myself keeps me afloat, ever hopeful that something nice will happen in the future, because it's something in life that's definitely worth being patient for: good, meaningful and plentiful intercourse.

More on topic, I would then consider myself abstinent, refraining from sex due to lack of adequate opportunity, as opposed to principle, religious or otherwise, that is, being celibate.

Celibacy = the state of not being married.
Abstinence = voluntary forbearance especially from indulgence of an appetite or cravingkeyword is VOLUNTARY.