How many lawyers does it take to shingle a roof?
It depends on how thinly you slice them.

'Architect And Construction Humor' is now in the planning stages.

"I think we may class the lawyer in the natural history of monsters."

-John Keats

Monsters And Other Fictional Folks
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/3037004

And then there's the one about the man who got sued by a lawyer...for telling a lawyer joke - I'm kidding! Please add your own law and lawyer humor to this discussion topic. :-)

"When you go into court, you're putting your fate into the hands of twelve people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty."

-Norm Crosby

One-Liner And Quotation Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/6795267

A doctor, a dentist, and an attorney were in a boat together when a wave came along and washed them overboard. Unable to get back into their capsized boat, they decided that two of them would hold on while the third would swim to shore for help. The doctor volunteered. The dentist said, "There are hundreds of sharks between here and the land. You'll get killed." Without further discussion, the attorney took off swimming toward shore. As he swam, the sharks moved aside. The dentist said, "That's a miracle!" The doctor said, "That's professional courtesy."

Dentist And Orthodontist Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/10262087

Doctor Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/5384088

Why do behavioral scientists prefer lawyers to rats for their experiments?
1) there are more of the lawyers to work with,
2) lawyers are more expendable,
3) lawyers do more harm to society than rats,
4) lab assistants are less likely to develop a bond or feel sympathy for lawyers,
5) rats arouse more feelings of compassion and humanity,
6) lawyers multiply faster,
7) rats have an innate right to life and liberty,
8) animal rights groups will not object to a lawyers torture,
9) rats have more dignity, and
10) there are some things even a rat won’t do.

At a party of professionals, a Doctor was having difficulty socializing. Everyone wanted to describe their symptoms, and get an opinion about diagnosis. The Doctor turned to a Lawyer acquaintance, and asked, "How do you handle people who want advice outside of the office?"
"Simple," answered the Lawyer, "I send them a bill. That stops it."
The next day, the Doctor, still feeling a bit reserved about what he had just finished doing, opened his mailbox to send the bills; there sat a bill from the Lawyer.

Super! :-)

99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name

What's the difference between lawyers and buzzards?
Lawyers have removable wing tips.

Clothing And Accessories Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/6455980

"Every law is an infraction of liberty."

-Jeremy Bentham

One-Liner And Quotation Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/6795267

A lawyer said to one of his clients, "When I was a kid, I wanted to be a pirate!" His client replied, "Congratulations."

Pirate Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/5522928

A lawyer said to one of his clients, "When I was a kid, I wanted to be a pirate!"
His client replied, "Congratulations."

'Pirate Humor' is on the way!

"Lawyers, I suppose, were children once."

-Charles Lamb

Childhood And Parenting Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/13709387

"We should be thankful for lawyers. If we didn't have them, who would get us out of the trouble they got us into?"

-Author Unknown

Miscellaneous Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/8390874