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- Since Christmas, I feel like I've played out at least 20,000 leagues worth of rope.I find myself "reeling" in the emotional psychological realm of feeling off balance and staggering.But after playng out all that rope...I'm NOT ABOUT to start...
- It would seem so. Our brains are hardwired that way. Have been accidentally and intensely researching some fascinating stuff about memories, and emotional imprinting, how it occurs, the voluminous differences in personal applications (and ties into...
- Many years ago in a f-2-f recovery meeting it was my time to address a topic.I told those there that we needed to "rethink" the word selfish. Society viewed it as selfISH...something very nasty and bad and evil to do.But as I explained. WE within...
- I did not land on an estranged parent site straightaway.It was a case of jumping from rock to rock in white water rapids, sometimes resting before taking the “lunge” for the next rocky platform. My vocabulary expanded exponentially – as did my...
- In recent days of roaming around and reading I saw a thread somewhere where an Estranged Parent was suggesting, "Don't take it personal." Reading that...I about coughed up a hairball. How in hell can parents in our straits NOT take it "personally"...
- Now it is two daughters ED. I knew the second was enroute and it happened.What really drove me around the bend IS the ongoing and developing behaviors so I was treated like a rather stupid, disobedient, incorrigible, defiant CHILD whose opinions...
- For about two months I've been watching hundreds of hours of Netflx Docuimentaries about WW2. Anything I learned in school was the "spin" of the victors' writing the history...Now the REAL truth comes out...as can happen, too, when helped along by...
- Hope for the best – expect the worst, they say. And that pretty much sums up Xmas 2015.But maybe it was actually a last very big hurdle to clear – trip, stumble, but clamber over – the way greased-along and slickened by tears to allow me to...
- TY so much , Alfreda, for for Smear Campaign link tucked into your post under Family Loyalty.. I bookmarked that.There has been NO loyalty to ME among certain ones for years. I believe they deluded themselves I'd never run out of loyalty (nor...
- I have been away researching in connecting areas, learning A LOT. (Narcissistic behavior, Engulfing, Triangulation and other terms that are new to me.) And been used against me for decades.Now fully ED, whose phone call on my b'day I let the machine...
- I wish I had a toggleswitch on the back of my neck so I could shut off my brain and stop thinking.Back in the early 1990s before we all had the internet, I did a lot of "interviewing", which was certainly not scientific, but WAS revealing. I assumed...
- Rolled out of the sack, another dreamless night, and had the ironic thought that in real life I no longer "bother to dream" and apparently my subconscious mind has given up, too, LOL.Reading the many candid and truth-varnished,...
- Last summer I started a document when things got REALLY bad and before I resigned the capacity to be scapegood and sometimes "useful idiot", but I didn't get far and quit.One can find about ANYTHING on the internet....so I searched A Mother's...
- I feel down today. Like a hamster running on a wheel in the cage, worn-damned-out about used up my stamina and getting nowhere.I have been reading and studying to figure out what happened and how to fix it (and do better as a mother than I had EVER...
- I've had faith in that strategy for decades as I've let others run amok and figured their behaviors would rear up to hang 'em as they bit themselves on the a$$.Proof, ALREADY, that my removal of myself via various tech blocks and refusing-to-engage...