Yet Another Blow
My heart breaks for my little boy. He has had to deal with so much loss in his 7 years, more than I had to even as a teenager. We found out yesterday that one of his football coaches unexpectedly passed away. Practice has been canceled all week and there is a wake on Friday. I have not decided on if I am going to take him or not. It will be very difficult for me, but I feel like I need to do this for my son and for his teammate (the coaches son is also on the team) I have also shared our experience with the team moms and have offered to answer any questions or offer any advice on how to deal with this with the kids and the family. I feel like helping others deal with this subject will be therapeutic for me in some strange way.
Mean while my world is spirling out of control it seems. I have never been the type of person to not perform to standard or above in the workplace. And now I am very fearful of losing my job. My ADHD makes working difficult in and of itself. But putting an ADHD person in a distracting environment is setting them up for failure. Since we have moved into our new space my work production has suffered. Where we use to be in this nice quiet area, we are now in a very open space and have been place right next to our claims department. No wall, no partition, just 20 feet of open space. And as if it isn't bad enough that they are on the phone all day, they are also very loud. It even bothers our managers. We have been told for 8 months now that they are working on a solution, yet here we are still suffering. And all of that would be hard enough to deal with on its own, so the fact that I learning how to live in this new life of mine is like chaining a bolder to me and throwing me into the ocean. I have a letter from my doctor about the ADHD that says I need a quiet workspace without distractions. And it suggest that I possibly work from home a few days a week to be more productive. I have spoken to HR and the only thing that I have been told I can do is one talk to my managers, and two maybe try to find another space in the office that is more suitable. The only problem with that is that every other department is hiring and there are no spaces left. The answer to me working from home was that it isn't written in the bylaws (or something like that) I am at my breaking point and honestly wouldn't be surprised if I get fed up enough here soon that I just walked out the door.
And the worst part is I feeling like I'm letting Brad down. It wasn't like this when he was alive. I'm literally losing it all, my life is crumbling.
Mean while my world is spirling out of control it seems. I have never been the type of person to not perform to standard or above in the workplace. And now I am very fearful of losing my job. My ADHD makes working difficult in and of itself. But putting an ADHD person in a distracting environment is setting them up for failure. Since we have moved into our new space my work production has suffered. Where we use to be in this nice quiet area, we are now in a very open space and have been place right next to our claims department. No wall, no partition, just 20 feet of open space. And as if it isn't bad enough that they are on the phone all day, they are also very loud. It even bothers our managers. We have been told for 8 months now that they are working on a solution, yet here we are still suffering. And all of that would be hard enough to deal with on its own, so the fact that I learning how to live in this new life of mine is like chaining a bolder to me and throwing me into the ocean. I have a letter from my doctor about the ADHD that says I need a quiet workspace without distractions. And it suggest that I possibly work from home a few days a week to be more productive. I have spoken to HR and the only thing that I have been told I can do is one talk to my managers, and two maybe try to find another space in the office that is more suitable. The only problem with that is that every other department is hiring and there are no spaces left. The answer to me working from home was that it isn't written in the bylaws (or something like that) I am at my breaking point and honestly wouldn't be surprised if I get fed up enough here soon that I just walked out the door.
And the worst part is I feeling like I'm letting Brad down. It wasn't like this when he was alive. I'm literally losing it all, my life is crumbling.
Replies
Hang in there, Erin. You\'re coping with so much and are not letting Brad down. Your work situation is incredibly tough - can your manager help? I\'ve found HR worse than useless and have got the most help from my manager.
You may find some useful stuff in this blog by a writer whose husband died suddenly https://hannahrichell.wordpress.com
Hugs to you and your son
Sandy
Thank you Sandy! I will definitely check this blog out! My manager and I talked today and we may have come up with something that may help. I sure hope so! I need my job for the time being, but ultimately I want to work from home. I am thinking about getting into real estate and have thought about trying to start my own business.