yet another day
Someone said to me that psychosis seems a very lonely road. I couldn't agree more. Despite having come to a place in my life where I feel like I can deal with the symptoms of the illness and let them work their way out, I still feel at a loss. I guess this goes for a lot of us. I am lonely, and I look at my life and not altogether satisfied with it. I want more out of life. I don't always feel able to change it - though I am reassured by the baby steps motto. I do feel so terribly feeble at times and so one baby step, to begin, feels insurmountable.
Insecurity and desire for more are probably just magnified because there's not so much else to focus on. I wish I had a partner a family and a great job with a future and viewable path ahead. Instead I live in a very different kind of life. I don't want to come off as completely ungrateful there are moments
in my life that are fulfilling. I just need to remind myself of them sometimes.
"Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect.” Margaret Mitchell
That phrase is pretty clear to me but somehow venting frees me up to feeling a bit better. Thanks for listening.
Insecurity and desire for more are probably just magnified because there's not so much else to focus on. I wish I had a partner a family and a great job with a future and viewable path ahead. Instead I live in a very different kind of life. I don't want to come off as completely ungrateful there are moments
in my life that are fulfilling. I just need to remind myself of them sometimes.
"Life's under no obligation to give us what we expect.” Margaret Mitchell
That phrase is pretty clear to me but somehow venting frees me up to feeling a bit better. Thanks for listening.
Replies
It can be lonely if you let it be that way. Depend on those who know what you are going through and you\'ll be lonely no more. I love you and care for you. Let\'s go down that road together when you feel down.
i could have written this myself. i hear you brother, and i have complete empathy.
yes indeed, baby steps, and allow yourself to be proud of what you have accomplished. :)
thanks guys. I appreciate it. :)
I am honored to be included among those who get to read your private thoughts and feelings. You express yourself well and I can relate to a lot of what you have written. I think that our cross to bear is uniquely difficult to cope with. Just know that if I can find a life partner of such high caliber despite my issues then truly ANYONE can do the same. Many of my problems have taken care of themselves--it just took a while. I hope you can find the strength to patiently endure your storms--until the sun breaks through the clouds. I am glad now to have suffered so much as it has given me the gift of empathy. Look to nature and music as you seek your healing. Hugs.
thanks Steve.
YOUR SO HUMAN !!!!
thanks Tim!