wish people (my 13 yr old) would understand

I'm done just done! I can't deal with his shit any more. There is part of me that just wants to sign custody over to his dad but I can't. If I did that it would defeat the purpose of me taking them with me when I left him. I left my ex because he was abusive in just about every way you can think of, so I took the kids with me. I thought that I had them out there soon enough ( they were 4,2, & 1) but now my 13 yr old can be just as abusive as his dad was.  he gets mad hits his younger brother or just starts running his mouth. I just wish he could understand how much this hurts me and causing me to just fall deeper into my depression. I've tried talking to him, his counselor has talked to him ( not about my depression).  He can completely change my day, my mood push me back down and he doesn't care!  It sucks, I had a great day today got up went to the gym, had lunch with a friend & her kids, actually had some energy to clean up part of my house then he got into his mood now i'm laying in bed writing this & having a drink.  My youngest 2 just don't seem to understand that I don't want to use my very little free time to clean their mess but every time I start looking around & see even a small mess I hear my ex husband telling me how lazy I am.  I have absolutely NO support from my family. my parents have denied my depression from day 1 they chose to look the other way  & just buy me things when I tried to kill myself while I was still in high school ( that was the first time I tried).  It wasn't until this past feb that my dad admitted (mostly to himself) that I did have depression & that is only because I had to put my oldest in the hospital for a few days where they started him on antidepressants & because he is temporarily living with my parents they have to watch him & also make sure he takes his meds, which he does. he's doing better now that he's on his meds too. I have had my middle one checked & was told that he doesn't have depression his is behavior.